The Attitude That Makes Life Sacred

Well, good morning, everybody. Good morning. My name's René, I'm one of the pastors here. Welcome to everybody joining us here live and everybody joining us over in the venue service in Munski Hall too. Great to have you guys with us and also everybody joining us on Facebook Live or on our website. However you are a part of this gathering, we welcome you and we're so glad that you're a part of what we are looking at today in the word of God.

Well, this morning, as we dive into scripture, I first want you to meet an interesting individual. Meet Kevin Bah, or as he prefers to be referred to, His Excellency the King. Kevin is the self-proclaimed exalted ruler, in his own words, of the Republic of Melosia. Now I know about Kevin because I used to work just down the street from this guy. He has personally declared independence from the United States of America. Now, if you're looking for the Republic of Melosia, you probably won't find it on Google maps because the boundaries of Kevin's kingdom are the 1.3 acres surrounding his home just outside of Dayton, Nevada. And I used to work at a radio station that was just like a mile down the road from him.

Melosia is an actual kingdom. I mean, it's got its own post office. It's got its own phone system. It has its own money system, good only within its borders. It even has its own navy, this rubber raft. It has sailors consisting of his teenage son. Now, of course, this is all in good natured fun, I'm pretty sure, but it's very elaborate. The kingdom now has its own website, its own national anthem. There are just a whole fleet of diplomats for the Republic of Melosia all around the globe right now. He takes this pretty seriously and has a lot of fun with it.

But I was thinking about Kevin this week and I thought, Kevin is really only living out what is secretly everybody's fantasy, right? Way down deep. We all, from the time we're like two years old, we have a secret desire to rule. To live in what you could call the kingdom of me. To say to everybody else, like a little kid, you're not the boss of me. And the passage of the Bible we look at today talks about that tendency. So grab your message notes from inside your bulletins or online, Everyday Sacred is the verse by verse series that we're in in the book of the Bible called James.

James is a short little book in the New Testament that's all about how to bring your faith into everyday life. And today, this is super relevant to all of us, but the message today can really change the way you experience the rest of your life, the quality of your experience. Because in the passage we look at this morning, James talks about the attitude that makes all of life sacred. There is one attitude that you can choose to have at any moment in your life. And if you have this attitude, it can bless every day, it can make every day more beautiful, more peaceful, more joyful. And its opposite can poison every day.

No matter how beautiful the weather, no matter how special the occasion, it can ruin the day. So one attitude can make every day blessed and beautiful and sacred. Its opposite attitude can poison every day. And the attitude that we're referring to here is something that's entirely within your ability to choose at any moment. And by the way, what I'm talking about is not some pastor telling you this, the two attitudes that James is going to tell you about in the verses we look at today, they're now being confirmed by research. In fact, I have personally spoken to the lead researcher on a major academic project at UC Davis about this.

It's called the Happiness Project, popularly, and they have researched what brings happiness. And they have confirmed that there is one single attitude that is likely to make anything you face, any circumstance of life, any day of your life happier, it's likely to make you healthier in measurable ways, it's likely to bring you peace, and it's an attitude, again, that you have within your power to choose, no matter how good or no matter how bad your day is. Now you're probably at this point going, okay, so what is it? I wanna know what the good attitude is. I'll get to it by the end of this message. But if you stick with me verse by verse through this passage, I have a feeling that you're probably going to guess what each of these attitudes are.

See if you can guess what it is. As we start in our section that we're going to look at today in the book of James, we're in James 3:13. We're just walking through it verse by verse this summer, such a practical book of the Bible. And James here is in context specifically talking about pastors, about leaders in the church, about people who choose to teach the assembly of God's people. He's talking about how they should operate. He's saying to pastors like me, you are not kings of your own kingdom. Churches are not your fiefdom. You know, this is not the kingdom of René. It's the kingdom of Valerie, everybody knows that. But in, just kidding, but in verse 13, this is who James is addressing.

Who is wise and understanding among you? In other words, who thinks that they have what it takes to be a leader? You've got wisdom, you've got understanding. Well, let them show it by their giftedness. Let them show it by their charisma. Let them show it by their decisive, strong leadership. Let them show it by their amazing ability to get up on stage and teach and hold people's attention. No, even though that is exactly how we tend to judge the teachers and the gurus and the pastors that we choose to follow. And that's bit us in the backside many times, hasn't it? He says, don't, that's great if they have those skills, but that's not how you should judge them. Let them show it. In other words, let them prove that they deserve to lead a congregation this way by their good life. By deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

Okay, now remember that word humility because James is going to be setting up a contrast here. Look at the next verse. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, talking to church leaders like me, and now remember those words, envy and selfish ambition, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Don't be in the denial about this. Such wisdom doesn't come down from heaven, but it's earthly. It's the way the people of the world work. You're looking more like Caesar than like Christ. It's unspiritual, it's demonic. Next verse, for where you have, he's talking about in the church, where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder in every evil practice.

So do you see that James is setting up a contrast? Here's the big picture for the verses that we're gonna be looking at today. James is contrasting two operating systems for life. On the one hand, there's humility, a gentleness, a servant leadership. But on the other hand, there is pride. And what James is going to argue in this passage is not just in churches, but when you and I go through any part of our lives, any relationship in life with humility, you will bless others. You'll have less stress in your relationship. Your prayer life will be vibrant. Your church will be beautiful. But when you go through life with pride, you poison everything.

Because you're living like the world is the kingdom of me. And you are the center of the universe. Now, in our American culture right now, the meaning of the word pride has shifted a little bit. We tend to use pride now in the English language. As a positive, it's kind of like healthy self-esteem, right? And that's great because everybody needs, at some level, a healthy self-esteem. But that's not what James is talking about here. He's not saying good self-esteem is bad. When the Bible uses the word that's translated pride, the word that our culture uses, that's the most equivalent to what the Bible is talking about, is the term egocentrism. Putting myself, my wants, my desires, my plans, at the center of my existence.

You've probably heard the saying ego, E-G-O, stands for edging God out, right? And that's exactly what James is talking about here. Put another way, the foundation of peace is really realizing two facts. Number one, there is a God. And number two, it's not me, right? In fact, there's a little exercise we do a couple of times a year here at Twin Lakes Church that is always helpful. So everybody get your index finger out, point up like this, and say, God, now point to yourself and say, not, not. Some of you are not doing this with enthusiasm. You're like, not? What? Let's try it with more enthusiasm like you mean it. God, not. Some of you are pointing at me, not. That's true too, that's fair.

Now, if that's the foundation of peace, then it's opposite the source of self-induced stress is saying God, playing God. Does that make sense? And all through this passage, James is contrasting these two approaches to life, saying God, not, or saying not God. Basically trying to play God or humbling myself before God. Now, remember when James starts, he's talking specifically here about church leadership, and he says, here's what happens. Here's what churches end up looking like when you have a prideful over a controlling pastor. There you find disorder and every evil practice. In other words, the church, which is meant to be life-giving, becomes abusive, cult-like, toxic, because the pastor is acting like a petty dictator, and everybody who attends the church needs to agree with him on every level, because he's basically the God, he's treating himself like King Kevin, and the church is like his own kingdom of Melosia.

And if you've been in a toxic church environment like that, let me just say, first, I am so, so, so sorry. And second, you will not find a book that has ever been published that rails against abusive, dictatorial church leadership more than the Bible does. This is all through the Bible, in the Hebrew part of the Bible, the Old Testament, the Greek part of the Bible, the New Testament, Jesus talks about this, Jeremiah talks about it, Isaiah talks about it, Peter talks about it, and here James talks about it. Do not let people who are egocentric and abusive and self-centered lead a church, because the environment goes toxic.

And James says, that's not what church is supposed to be like, here's what godly leadership is supposed to produce in a church, he says, but the wisdom that comes from heaven, in other words, the leadership that is from God that's leading in a Christ-like way is first of all, pure, and then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, it's not just my way or the highway all the time, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere, peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness. He's saying, if you want a group of righteous people in your church, you want a holy congregation, you're not gonna get it like that, you sow seeds of peace, and then you're patient as a leader, and eventually, if you lead like this, eventually you will harvest righteousness in the people that you lead and in yourself.

So James is saying, this is the vision, right? This is what church is supposed to be like, this is what humble servant leadership brings. Now, you might be thinking, well, I dodged a bullet this morning because I'm not a church leader, so none of this applies to me, I could've stayed home today. Not so fast. Because next, James goes on to say, you do realize that trying to play God can poison every other aspect of your life. A father and a husband who is over-controlling and dictatorial can poison his relationship with his kids, with his wife. A mom who's over-controlling can do the same thing. Behaving like this can poison your career, it can poison every friendship relationship, it can poison your happiness.

Now, nobody thinks they have this problem. Kind of making myself the center of my universe, trying to play God. When we're doing it, that's a major blind spot in our lives. So James says, let me give you a little exam. Let me ask you some questions. You could call this an eye exam, four symptoms of eye disease, when I am at the center of my existence. Be honest about this. Do any of these questions apply to you? Number one, James points out that when I'm egocentric, I am quick to quarrel, to bristle, to argue, to get defensive at the drop of the hat. I'm always testy. Why? Because I want everything to go my way. And when the universe doesn't cooperate with my plans when I hit a red light, or I get in a long line, seriously, or I don't get chosen for an honor, or I don't get the promotion that I feel like I deserve, or when somebody dares to stand in my way, or doesn't see things my way, or doesn't do everything my way, it drives me crazy.

James 4:1, what causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you? He's not talking about desires that battle within you like this. He's talking about desires that battle within you like this. Your pugilistic in attitude toward the rest of the world. When your ego rules, there is tension in every other relationship. In fact, this wanting to be on the throne, I wanna be King Kevin, or King René, or King whoever, this causes almost every conflict between people, from road rage to church splits, from family splits to world wars. Now here's what makes this so tough to stop. Would you agree with this? We live in such a quarrelsome culture right now, right? There's all kinds of blowhards on the left and the right. We're trying to convince you in the media that what you need to do is just be outraged all the time for their own agendas. They want everybody to walk around just grieved all the time.

Watch your outrage level, because being prickly all the time is probably a symptom that you are trying to edge God out, and it's gonna poison everything else in your life. Second symptom, I'm continually dissatisfied. I'm continually dissatisfied. James says, "You desire, but you don't have, so you kill. You covet, but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and you fight." Great word there that people don't use a lot these days, covet, to covet is a sin we don't talk about a lot because we all do it. You want stuff that other people have, but you don't have. And what James is talking about here is the poisonous attitude that you could call prideful entitlement. This constant feeling of, "I should have that. Ticks me off that I don't have it in my life right now." And this tends to express itself in one of three ways. You owe me, God owes me, or I owe me.

You owe me, and this is usually expressed in anger, you have what I think should be mine, or God owes me, or if you don't believe in God, the world owes me, and this is usually expressed in jealousy, I should have that thing that God gave that person that should be mine, God, what about me? Or I owe me, and this is usually expressed in, you know, I deserve a break. I've been working so hard, and I've been so good, so I'm gonna indulge myself, I'm gonna be a self-destructive idiot today 'cause I deserve it, right? So James is saying you are constantly dissatisfied because you have this sense of, "Everybody else owes me. I don't have what I have, and I want it." Watch this, he says, "You don't have because you don't ask God, and when you ask, you don't receive because you ask with wrong motives that you may spend what you get on your pleasures." In other words, this is so good.

Even when you pray to God, really ego is still at the center of your prayers. It's all about you, even your prayers are all about you. Anne Lamont, a writer who lives up in Sausalito, she writes about how every healthy prayer boils down to one of three words, help, thanks, or wow. She says, "Really, when you look at every prayer in the Bible, they boil down to one of those three things, help, a prayer of confession and repentance." God, help with this. I did it again, help. Or thanks, God, I'm so thankful for what you've given me, or wow, God, you are so great, so majestic, so powerful, so amazing. And James is saying your prayers are not help, thanks, wow. They're give, give, give. In essence, when you're driven by ego, your prayer becomes, "My kingdom come, my will be done on earth as it should be in heaven." And thinking like this is going to make you crazy, because the universe, as they say, will not cooperate with this prayer.

Instead, pray like Jesus did, "Father, here's my request, nevertheless, not my will, but your will be done." And then give thanks to God for all the blessings that you already have. So James gives us these two symptoms, and then the third kind of tell that I'm probably becoming a little bit egocentric is that I am taken in by the spirit of this world. I am taken in by the spirit of this world. Now let me explain that. The next couple of verses are kind of hard to understand, but so important, so don't miss this. Next verse, he says, "You adulterous people," wow. "Don't you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God. Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God." Now, wait a minute, what's that supposed to mean? Am I not supposed to be friends with the world? Aren't I supposed to, as Ephraim said a couple of weeks ago, "Build bridges to the world and make friends with the world"? Doesn't the Bible tell me to do that? Didn't Jesus do that? Doesn't the Bible say Jesus was a friend of sinners?

Isn't that why the religious people were driven crazy by Jesus Christ? Doesn't the Bible say in the most famous verse in the Bible, God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes may not perish but an everlasting life. So if God loves the world and Jesus was a friend of the world, why does James say, "Don't be friendly with the world"? What is James talking about here? Well, what he means is not people, he's talking about being friendly with the spirit of this world. The way this world thinks that leadership and taking charge and being ambitious and getting stuff done should happen. Looking out for number one. Specifically, again, in context, James has been warning against abuse of church leadership. So he's warning against doing God's work the world's way, that ego-driven way, that looking up for number one way, that scratching and clawing and fighting and elbowing aside everybody else's spirit.

I mean, in James's Roman Empire era context, 2,000 years ago, he's saying, "Be careful that you don't act more like Caesar than like Christ." Now, how does that affect us today? I mean, I'll give you a very specific example. A few years ago, it seemed like every pastors' conference that I went to, pastors that attended were carrying around the Bible, and a book just about as thick as the Bible that Steve Jobs' biography by Walter Isaacson. Rivening book, I loved it, but I gotta tell you right now, a little peek into my world, I lost track of how many pastors told me, "We in the church need to lead like this." And I'd say, "Really so? You wanna lead by cussing out your employees and making everybody afraid of you, is that what you're saying?" Well, no, of course not, but I gotta tell you, that's exactly where some of these guys went.

Now, I loved Steve Jobs, I loved the gadgets, his genius concocted with the help of his amazing team. Our oldest son works for the company he founded, Apple, but total leadership role model, I think not. Even Steve Wozniak, the co-founder of Apple, famously told him one day, "You know, Steve, you can be a genius without being a jerk." And James is saying, "You must be a Christian without being a jerk." Another peek into my world, once in a while, I get to speak at some of what people would call mega churches, wonderful, great, giant churches. But it's always really interesting to me what these churches are like backstage. Because some are so loving and relaxed and peaceful and joyful and it's amazing to me because you're talking about churches with massive ministries and people are just so relaxed, and you can tell loving relationships are the core of what they're all about on the team.

But some of them backstage are tense, and you can tell everybody's fearful, they're afraid of making even just one little mistake. I suspect the first kind are churches where growth in the fruit of the spirit is what's valued. Love and joy and peace and gentleness, what the Bible talks about is the fruit of the spirit, and so that's what they get. That's what they value. And in the second kind, the fearful places, in my observation, my suspicion, is that those are the churches where growth is valued, period. Just growth is the lone metric. And so the pastors of these churches gauge their own significance solely on metrics, the number of people attending, or the number of people in Sunday school, the number of people who've been baptized, the amount of giving that's coming in. And these pastors are so unhappy as people because if the metrics are good, they're happy. If the metrics are bad, they're unhappy.

And now true confession time. If I am not extremely careful, I can find myself slipping into this constantly. And that's when I find that I am getting testy and quarrelsome, continually dissatisfied with the way things are going around here, and I find myself reading all kinds of business books and wanting to run this place like the spirit of the world does. In other words, exactly what James is pointing out. So what does God want from you and me here in our homes, in our businesses, in our relationships? Next verse, he says, "Do you think the scriptures have no meaning? They say that God is passionate, that the spirit he has placed within us should be faithful to him." What does God want more than anything else? What any relationship wants, faithfulness. What does he want from me here? Just be faithful to this place, to my calling, same with families, same with marriages, same with careers. Long-term faithfulness is going to produce healthy growth, maybe not instantly, but eventually.

Now, I wanna skip a couple of verses I'm gonna come back to you in a minute, but in verse 11, James says, and here's one last sign of kind of ego-driven life, I take joy in judging. I take joy in judging. He says, "Don't speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, then you're criticizing and judging God's law." In other words, you're playing God, because when I sit in judgment on everybody else, then I'm putting myself in the position of their judge. Now, the way that judging usually plays out is not blatantly saying, "You know, I judge you to be my inferior," right? Nobody comes out and says that usually, but here's the way it plays out in most of our lives.

It's when someone gets in the way of my plans somehow, the way I judge is I infer the worst possible motive. They're trying to sabotage me. They don't like me in this, they're doing this because they don't like me personally. Or they didn't do it, they're just lazy bums. I jump to conclusions, I put others down by inferring the worst possible motives because how dare they get in my way of my agenda and schedule and calendar, I know best, don't they know that? And so all of these four things, James is saying, this is how envy and selfish ambition, playing God, having that sense of prideful entitlement poisons all of your life, can poison every relationship.

So what can be done about this? Because this is a human tendency from the time you're old enough to have agency, from the time you're two years old, this is a human tendency. It's in our DNA to act like this. So what can we do about it? I'm at the slightest idea, let's close in prayer. No, that's where James goes in the next section. James, I never want you to leave church in despair, like, wow, I really got beat up today. I mean, sometimes the Bible does challenge us, but it never stays there. It always goes on to hope. And this is where James goes. He says, here's how to cure my eye problem, my ego problem. And we're gonna go through these quickly. Three things James talks about.

Number one, he says, you gotta recognize the source of self-centered pride. What's the source of the whole impulse to be God of my own life? It might surprise you. James says at the end of verse seven, in context with this whole argument here, he says, so resist the devil. And he'll flee from you. He's talking about the source of your own self-centered behavior. Now I realize to some of you, that might sound ridiculous. The devil. Okay, right. But of course, I am not talking about, James is not talking about, you know, the stereotype guy with the red pajamas and the pitchfork and the horns and the little goatee and the British accent. Has God really said not to eat fruit? This is not who we're talking about.

James is saying there is an evil force that is determined to divert glory from God, an evil spiritual force. And you might not agree, but the Bible definitely teaches that. Okay, but why is that even important? Why bring up the devil in this discussion? This is so, so, so important. What James is saying is that self-centeredness is not just curmudgeonly. It's not just impolite. It's evil. Because think about it. What is really the source of every single misery that human beings have ever inflicted on other human beings, self-centeredness? So the next time you, you know how sometimes you get that little tingle of self-righteousness? And somebody's not doing something that you want. You get that little tingle and you sense yourself clenching your teeth and your fists and you go, you know what, darn it, I am going to have my way because I am right. Slow down and think about what may just be the source of that.

And then second, as they say in 12-step groups, resign as general manager of the universe. Resign as general manager of the universe because that job has already been filled by Valerie. No, James says, James says in verse 12, "There's only one lawgiver and judge, the one who's able to save and destroy, but you, who are you to judge your neighbor?" In other words, stop trying to control every person around you. That's not your job. And stop trying to control every event around you. There's one judge and it's not you. Anyone remember the movie Bruce Almighty? Does anybody remember that movie? Jim Carrey plays a man who does not think God's doing a very good job being God. And one day he screams, God, you are doing a lousy job, as in I never get what I want or what I know I deserve.

In my career, in my relationships, I could run this world a lot better than you. And then he gets his chance. Watch this. - You've been doing a lot of complaining about me, Bruce. Quite frankly, I'm tired of it. - Wait, wait, wait, wait. Don't come near me, seriously. I'm back into a quarter of like a wild animal. I don't want to hurt you, but I will out of instinct. - You haven't won a fight since grade five when that was against a girl. - Yeah, she was huge. She could have it back. - And the sun was in your eyes. Oh, the eagle. Anyway, I brought you here to offer your job. - Your job, my job. - My job. You think you can do it better, so here's your chance. When you leave this building, you will be endowed with all my powers. And so, Bruce gets a chance to be God for a week. How do you think he does? Well, here's how he decides to answer everybody's prayers, for example, which he receives by email.

He sees all these prayers over three million a minute piling up, and he sees everything everybody wants and just decides to select all and click yes. Every single person gets whatever they want. Yes to all. And guess what happens? Chaos. Every traffic light is green for everybody, so all the cars crash. Every single person who plays the lottery wins the lottery. So everybody gets like 39 cents. So an angry mob storms the lottery building. There's just chaos, and at the end of the movie, Bruce finally sees he has created a disaster by playing God. And it's caused him nothing but heartbreak. And so he comes to this moment. (dramatic music) You win. I'm done. Please, I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't wanna be done. I want you to decide what's right for me. I surrender to your will. (dramatic music) And Bruce finally finds peace.

Well first he gets hit by a truck, and then he finds peace. But that's exactly what James is talking about here. You can resign as general manager of the universe, and then third, realign myself with God. I realign myself with the true God. And by the way, these three things, recognize, resign, and realign, you may probably have to do these three things many times every day. Recognize, resign, and realign with the true center of the universe. James says, "So humble yourselves before God." And the word translated humble is actually a military term in the Greek for when a soldier puts himself in the proper order in line, the proper rank. When I humble myself before God, when I say God, not. That's not God wanting me to put myself down. James is saying, you know, maybe counterintuitively, when I humble myself, that's when I'm lifted to heights of peace and serenity and satisfaction that I may have never dreamed of.

Verse 10, "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up." Now, I wanna make something clear. Praise God, James is not calling on you to try harder to be humble, because that never works 'cause it's still all about your effort, right? I'm gonna be the most humble person in the whole world. People will be so impressed. And then you're striving to be humble, but it's all about ego again. So what's the answer to not playing God? Well, go back up to verse six, but He, God, gives us more grace. And that's why scripture says God opposes the proud but gives what? Grace to the humble. Grace means God's free gift, and He gives grace to the humble. God's gift of salvation through Christ. And all the rest of God's free gifts just lavished upon me.

And with a gift, you can't achieve a gift, you just receive a gift. So what God is saying, listen, look up here and don't miss this. What God is saying is this, instead of trying harder to not be prideful, which is not gonna work, that's a self-defeating cycle, God is saying, let me take your ego out of the equation entirely, and make your salvation and your spiritual restoration entirely my gift of grace to you. You can't earn a thing because then you could boast about it pridefully. Instead, you just receive it. That's the gospel. And ultimately, that's the only possible cure for an ego-driven life. Doesn't that sound great to you? Don't you get tired sometimes of just focusing on yourself all the time, focusing on why other people aren't doing what you want them to do, focusing on why you don't have all the stuff you think you should have?

Instead, live in humble awe of God's grace to you. When I started, I talked about Robert Emmons at UC Davis, who I've had the chance to talk with. His team there has done research on happiness, what creates happiness and what creates unhappiness. He says what brings unhappiness can be boiled down to one thing, a sense of prideful entitlement. I should have that and that and that, exactly what James has been talking about in this passage. But he says the opposite of prideful entitlement, humble gratitude, literally improves everything in your life. Your relationships, your happiness level, your health. And this is the attitude that makes every day sacred. Humble gratitude. Where every day you say, "God, I don't deserve all these blessings. You lavish on me. They're a gift, but I'm so grateful." That attitude will bless every moment of every day of your life.

So why don't we focus on God together in gratitude right now? Let's pray. Let's bow our heads together. And before I lead you in prayer with our heads bowed, I feel like I should say this. I know that probably some people walked into church today ready to give up. Well, I wanna say to you that that's actually, that can be a very healthy place to be. Go ahead and give up like Bruce did in that clip to God. Tell him, "I surrender. Take the reins, take the wheel." And remember, God's not asking you to try harder to be good. He's saying, "Receive my grace through Jesus Christ." So try praying something like this in your heart. Dear heavenly father, I wanna stop making my life all about me all the time. I'm so tired of that. Tired of it. I wanna forget myself and I wanna be lost in wonder of you. Thank you, thank you Jesus for dying on the cross to pay for my sins so that I could be forgiven, that that was a gift. I just, I don't understand it. I can't comprehend it, but I choose to receive your grace today and I surrender to you. In Jesus name, amen.