Wrestling with God

But I am glad that you are here this morning. Find your message notes with this logo all in rediscovering the power of commitment. And if you ever read what people have to say about commitment, people like coaches, athletes, business gurus, celebrities, politicians, pastors, they all talk about this very same power. In fact, you'll be hard pressed to find anyone who says commitment is a bad thing, not if you want to make something of your life. So what's the problem? Why do so many of us struggle with commitment? If commitment is essential to lasting marriages, to blessing families, to turning ideas into action, what gives? Why wouldn't we all just be ultra committed all the time? You ever thought of it that way? If commitment is good, why do we so often avoid it?

Well, I don't think anyone has put his finger on or summed up the problem with commitment than that great theologian Sammy Davis Jr. I maybe, I don't know about the theologian part, but check this out, this is really good. He said, "You always have two choices, your commitment versus your fear." You always have two choices. On one side there's your commitment, on the other side there's fear because commitment always involves risks and that's why we wrestle over it. I have a very close friend, super bright, talented, gifted, smart, and he has a ton of things going for him. He's a mature Christian guy, but when it came to making a marriage commitment to his fiancée, a gal he dated for four years, no less, he backed out of the engagement not once, but two times. I mean, can you believe that? Have you ever heard of somebody doing this?

René, in all of your years of ministry, do you know anybody who has done this to their dear, sweet, loving fiancée two times? Perhaps you could counsel someone like this. Share your wisdom. Okay, insider joke alert, if you don't know what I'm talking about, check out René's confessional sermon from two weeks ago. It's on our website, tlc.org. I think it's entitled, "How I Tempted My Fiancé to Murder Me" or something like that, but behind all of that was that same dilemma, commitment versus fear, and they are always at odds with each other. And this doesn't just happen in our human relationships, by the way. We do this in our faith as well because if I commit myself to God, if I say, "Lord, I want to do something for you, Lord, here I am, I'm ready to go," there's some risk involved in that too because the Lord might just say, "Well, that's great, Mark. I was just looking for someone to send to Africa." And then I want to say, "Well, did I say what you want?" Really, actually what I meant was what I want. So when God wants what I want, I'm like, "Go God!" When He wants something else, that's a little bit more complicated.

Now, I'm wondering if any of you can relate to me in any of this or am I just alone here? Do any of you just wrestle with your commitments to the Lord? Just raise your hand. Let me just...I just want to know if I'm...okay, we're all together here. Well, good, because that's our focus today. We're going to talk about wrestling with God. And there's a guy in the Bible named Jacob who is the poster boy for anyone who's ever wrestled with God. In fact, he literally goes mano a mano with the Lord, if you can believe that. It is one of the strangest stories in the entire Bible. So you got to see this for yourself. Open your Bibles to Genesis 32. And if you don't have a Bible, grab one of those pew Bibles. You can have your Bible on one side, your notes on the other. And this is an incredible story. And I put most of the verses in your notes. And if you're looking those over, you might be thinking, "Well, it looks like you put most of the Bible in my notes, Mark." But don't worry, we're going to rip through this pretty quickly. I don't see us getting out any later than one, maybe two tops. So no problem.

But here's Jacob's life in a nutshell. It's in Hosea 12:3. And why don't you just read this with me? Let's make this our theme verse this morning. Let me hear you read this. Here we go. "Even in the womb, Jacob struggled with his brother. When he became a man, he even fought with God." That's Jacob in a nutshell. He's a struggler. He's a fighter. The name Jacob basically means supplanter. That's the general term. Kind of guy who is vying to take your place, to supplant you. It also means one who follows at the heel. You might want to write both of those down. He follows at the heel. In other words, he's the kind of guy who will sneak up behind you. He will trick you. In our day, we would call him a backstabber. Now, nowadays, Jacob only means good things. So if that's your name or someone you love is Jacob, don't worry about it. It's only good things now. But back then, not so good.

In fact, if you want a really spicy summer read, you don't have to really look any farther than Jacob's story here in Genesis. We don't have time to go through all of it. But I've kind of put some bullet points there. You kind of fly over his life leading up to the passage we're going to see today. "He's born grabbing his brother Esau's heel," hence the name heel grabber. And by the way, his brother Esau, his fraternal twin, that name means hairy. And Esau grows up into this brawny mountain man. He is just a fierce dude, not the kind of guy that you would want to mess with. And yet, Jacob is undaunted by this. And so eventually he persuades Esau to sell his birthright. He cons him out of it. And if that's not enough, he then tricks his father into giving Esau his blessing. So now he's got the material inheritance and then the spiritual inheritance. This blessing has to do with really the legacy that these men would have. And Jacob's legacy from here on out, God will use his family, his descendants, to save the world. Jesus is a descendant of Jacob.

Esau, on the other hand, he becomes a marginal figure in Scripture. And of course, God knew all this. God decided all this in advance. But Esau doesn't know this. All he knows is he's been outmaneuvered by his brother. And so he vows to kill him. And he's certainly capable of delivering on that threat. Jacob then has to flee for his life. And he runs into another country where his Uncle Laban lives. And once there, he gets tricked by Uncle Laban into marrying his daughter, Leah. Now Laban had two daughters. Leah was the oldest. Jacob was in love with the younger one, Rachel. And somehow Laban mastermised the switcheroo on the wedding night. I have no idea how he does this. But Jacob wakes up the next morning next to Leah. Wow. By the way, ever since that day, it's typical to use a lot of candles at weddings so you know exactly who you're marrying. Okay, I just made that up.

But then, continuing with the drama, Jacob marries Leah's sister Rachel, the one he wants, a week later. Now just let that soak in. One week later, he marries his wife's sister. It's just starting to get crazy. Because this birthing competition ensues between these two sisters. In fact, they each recruit their handmaids. So now, over the course of time, Jacob will have 12 sons and one daughter by four different women. And you can only imagine how dysfunctional that is. In fact, you don't have to imagine it. You can just read the rest of Genesis. It's a great case for why polygamy is a really bad idea. But for 20 years, Jacob works as Laban's livestock manager. He manages his herds and he comes up with a scheme where he selectively breeds Laban's livestock in such a way that Jacob's own flocks increase much faster than Laban's. And so Jacob becomes rich. In fact, he becomes richer than Laban, which doesn't thrill Laban or his sons. And they start muttering threats under their breath and Jacob has to flee now from Laban.

And it's at this point in his life, God has to intervene. Like even before he leaves Laban, God speaks and his story opens up with this in Genesis 31:3. It says, "Then the Lord said to Jacob, 'Go back to the land of your fathers and to your relatives and I will be with you.' And if the Lord hadn't intervened, Laban would have surely killed Jacob." So that's his track record so far. Starts with him burning his brother, cheating his brother. He has to run for his life only to do the same thing over 20 years with Uncle Laban. And then what does God say to him? God tells him to go back where? To the land of your fathers and your relatives. God sends him right back to Esau.

Now let me ask you, is there someone in this world that you would prefer to never see again? Someone that you just don't want to face. Maybe it's someone that you treated badly. Maybe it's someone you burned. Someone that you fear. Well with Jacob, this could not be any more intense. This is not some sort of mild level of anxiety. Every step he takes away from Laban brings him one step closer to Esau and the threat that he remembers 20 years earlier, "I will kill him" is ringing in his ears. The walls are closing in on Jacob. There is nowhere to run. And now Jacob is going to have to deal with some serious issues in his life. In fact, there's three I want to point out today. Three that you and I will have to deal with in our own lives. And if you haven't dealt with any of these yet, you will. So write these down. "First of all, like Jacob, from time to time, I will wrestle with my past." Sooner or later things have a way of catching up with us, don't they? Things come home to roost and Jacob knows it.

So here's what he does next. He knows Esau's somewhere out there over the horizon. So he sends some scouts ahead. And when they come back, the news is grim. Verse 6 of chapter 32. "When the messengers returned to Jacob, they said, 'We went to your brother Esau, and now he is coming to meet you, and 400 men are with him.'" Yikes. If I was Jacob, I would be having some serious bladder control issues right about now. I mean, this is intense. Like I said, Esau is this, this hulk, this hairy beast of a man. And not only that, but he's an expert with weapons. He's a perfect shot. He spends his time hunting, killing things all the time. He's been preparing for this showdown all his life. Jacob, on the other hand, you know what he did growing up? He helped keep the tents clean with Mommy. Swapped recipes with her. There is no competition between these two guys. It is a fight that Jacob cannot possibly win.

Reminds me of a time years ago, I was directing Camp Hammer. We had a guy on our staff named DJ Ashford. DJ, when he was born, weighed 15 pounds. Now, I guess that's possible for a baby. I don't know if that's possible for a mother, but somehow DJ is born into this world, and he is just a big, big guy. In fact, I remember his hands were twice the size of a normal man's hands. His arms were as thick as a man's legs. His head was just like a globe. It was huge. He, big old beard. He weighed 360, 370 pounds. In fact, the camp, we all have nicknames up there. We named him Chewie after Chewbacca because he was this big, hairy beast of a guy. And one time we're down in the gym, and I don't know what kind of idiocy overtook me in the moment, but I said, "DJ, I could last a minute with you in the ring." I don't know why I did this. And down in the gym there, in the rooms, there's like this carpet square, and that's the ring. And in my mind, I'm thinking, all I have to do is outrun him for 60 seconds. I don't have to touch him. In fact, I don't want to touch him.

So I'm running around the room like, "You can't get me, big guy. You can't get me until about 45 seconds in." And I feel like this vice script's like a python just going, "Poom." And it's like, "Uh-oh." And there is no breaking this guy's grip. I mean, you know, I'm not like some sort of weightlifter, but I'm not a pushover either. And I never felt the strength that I felt in that moment. And he just smiles, this big wide rim, and he just kind of reels me in like this. And then I feel those big python arms just kind of wrap around me. In fact, I'm going to help you picture this because I see a friend of mine. Robert, would you come over here? I'm playing the part. Robert is going to play the part of DJ here. Come here, Robert. Hurry up. Let's welcome Robert here. Okay, so get up here, Robert. Like I'm going to tell him what to do, right? You're DJ. Okay. So, do you get the picture now? This is what we're talking about. This is how much of an idiot I was. And DJ, you don't have to hug me, but DJ just kind of grabs me in this big bear hug, and I have never felt a squeeze like that in life. I don't want to feel one now. He squeezes so hard. Every molecule of air has been squeezed out of my body. Every, no, keep it going, big guy. Every vertebrae in my back cracks, and then he does something I will never forget. Like a giant sequoia, he just falls forward right on top of you. Don't you dare do that. Okay.

Hey, here's the deal. Jacob Esau. Get the picture. Let's thank Robert for, thank you, Robert. Thank you. That's Jacob's strategy. Just keep one step ahead of Esau. Just don't let him get you. But finally, he runs out of steps. He runs out of room, and he runs right back into the big man. Now, personally, I don't have those kind of issues with my big brother Paul. At least not once that I care to air out here. But seriously, we're great. But there are things that I do wrestle with in my past. Moments, relationships, choices, things I've said that if I could go back and do differently, I surely would. And I'm just betting that some of you feel the exact same way. We all have these things in our past that we got to wrestle with. And there's no magic pill that we can take to make it all go away. It's just there. But we can do this. We can invite God's grace into those places, whether it's for the first time or the hundredth time. We can say, "Jesus, I want to give those places to you, the broken places, the places where I carry shame and guilt." Those wounded places. I just want to give them back to you.

So ask yourself this question, what still haunts me? What haunts you specifically? Your regrets? Your mistakes? Remember, Jesus offers His grace. And I know we all believe that to one degree or another, but sometimes it's hard for that message to sink in. Maybe this will help. Let me ask you a question. Do you believe that God has forgiven me for everything that I've ever done? Do you believe that? Would you raise your hand if you believe that just so I can see? Okay. You no doubt believe in the depth of God's grace. So thank you very much. And I do too. Do you believe that God forgives René for everything that He's ever done? Don't answer too quick because remember, He reneged on His proposal two times. But do you believe that God has forgiven Him for everything He's ever done? Raise your hand. Okay. Amen. Of course. Now let me ask you, do you believe God has forgiven you for every single thing you have ever done?

Okay. Some of us are a little bit slower though to affirm that God's grace extends all the way into our hearts. It's easy to believe that God's grace is out there for everyone else. It's a lot harder for that message to press itself down into the specifics of our past. To believe that God's grace is given completely, freely, generously. And whatever your regrets are, Jesus says, "Give them to me." That's what it means when we commit ourselves to Him. We're entrusting ourselves in. We're giving all that over. And Jesus says, "You don't have to look over your shoulder anymore. If you know anything about the Apostle Paul, you know he had quite a past himself." And yet He says to the Philippians, "But one thing I do, one thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. You don't have to be haunted by your fears." But let's face it, we're all human. So we wrestle.

And the second thing we wrestle to is often connected, I should say. It's often connected to the things in our past and that is our fears. Like Jacob, I will also wrestle with my fears. And can you imagine Jacob scanning the horizon, waiting for some sign of Esau's approach, you know, the inevitable dust cloud that comes up as his army charges forward? For us it would be like, let's say you ticked off the leader of some biker gang, right? And now you hear the distant thunder of 401 Harleys thundering down the road and they're all headed for you. That's Jacob. What does he do? Well let's find out. Picking up at verses 7 and 8. "In great fear and distress," and by the way in the original Hebrew that means in great fear and distress. He is freaking out. "Jacob divided the people who were with him into two groups. He thought if Esau comes and attacks one group, the group that is left may escape." Now thankfully most of us have probably not had to face a threat this severe where we're actually having to think that half of our family might die. But even so, we all have our fears.

And so ask yourself, what am I afraid of? Again specifically, what is it? It could be something as simple as what other people think of you. I used to carry this fear with me. I was afraid of what other people thought. And then I came to a point in my life where I suffered some losses. And I had a front row seat to the loss of other people. And I realized there are a lot worse things in this world than what other people think of you. So God sometimes uses pain and loss to burn out some of these trivial fears. But your fears perhaps are not some sort of internal thing. Maybe they're an external reality, something you really are quite terrified of because you're totally helpless in a situation. You didn't bring it on yourself. It just came upon you, this severe trial. Maybe you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time, or the wrong industry at the wrong time, or the wrong investments at the wrong time, or the wrong friends, or maybe you even think I was born into the wrong family. And you're overwhelmed with the implications of all that.

Whatever the fear, you can either choose to live in that fear or live in God's mercy and His grace. In other words, you can choose the fear or you can choose God's lap. But you can't choose both. Well, what does Jacob do? What does he choose? Well, let's see, verses 9 through 12. "Then Jacob prayed, 'O God of my father Abraham, God of my father Isaac, Lord, you who said to me, go back to your country and your relatives and I will make you prosper. I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. Save me, I pray, for I'm afraid Esau will come back and attack me and also the mothers with their children. But you have said I will surely make you prosper and make your descendants like the sand of the sea which cannot be counted.' Look back over that prayer and circle the words, 'You who said to me and but you said.' And you see this thing going on in Scripture where people like Abraham and Jacob and Moses and David in so many ways they say, 'You said Lord, you have said, you promised.'

Remember? Sometimes my kids will say, 'Dad, you promised.' And they do that because I need to be reminded. But God never needs to be reminded. God doesn't forget His promises, we forget His promises. And so take a tip from Jacob here and pray those promises back to the Lord. It builds up our faith and it reminds me of this next thing which is, what am I counting on? What's the foundation that I know to be true no matter what? Because when we pray this way, what we're essentially saying is, 'God, it's either you or nothing. I've hitched my wagon to You, Lord. I'm going to ride this all the way to the end.' And God is never offended when we say, 'God, You promised.' It's like this quote I found by a guy named Andy Richardson. He says, 'What comes from heaven in a promise should be sent back to heaven as a prayer.' Comes to heaven as a promise should just be sent back as a prayer.

And when you're wrestling with your fears, start by simply talking to God about His promises. And you're thinking to yourself, perhaps, 'Well, Mark, I don't even know what His promises are.' Well, in the very middle of your Bible, there's a book called Psalms. It's packed with promises. Like Psalm 23, "The Lord is my shepherd." He promises to be your shepherd. "Okay, Lord, You said You would be my shepherd." He leads me beside still waters. "Lord, Your promise is to lead me beside still waters. He restores my soul, Lord. I need someone to restore my soul." "You said, Lord, You would restore my soul." And when we do that, those prayers that begin with fear, they bring us into a place of comfort, a place of peace. And that's exactly what Jacob does right here. Praise, and he says, "Lord, You said." And then the next day, he wakes up and he sends his family, his flocks, everything he has across a river that marks the entrance of Esau's territory. And Esau hangs back on the far shore all by himself. The sun sets and the darkness sets in, and then this story takes the most unexpected of turns.

You got to check this out starting at verse 24. "So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till daybreak. When the man saw he could not overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob's hip so that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man. Then the man said, 'Let me go, for it is daybreak.' But Jacob replied, 'I will not let you go unless you bless me.'" Now, what in the world is this all about? I have no idea, let's just close in prayer. There's a lot about this story I don't understand. I don't think there's a lot about this story that anyone understands, but there's a couple things. First of all, like Jacob, there will come a time in life that I will wrestle with the Lord. I will wrestle with my God. Now, to be clear, God is a spirit. God the Father doesn't have a body, but in His grace, God appears to Jacob in human form because that's what Jacob needs in that moment. Maybe you've heard the expression, "Your arms are too short to box with God." Well, Jacob needs to learn that. That's the lesson that he needs to learn. So God shows up in His life and they begin to wrestle.

And like Jacob, so often with us, he comes in the middle of the night, doesn't he? In the darkness. When you lay awake and you look up at the ceiling and you ask yourself, or you ask God, "God, do my prayers, did they make a difference? Can I really count on your promises? Are you really there?" This is a wrestling match that we will all inevitably have. That Craig Barnes, who was here last week, gave a wonderful message. And in his book, "Hustling God," he says this about this wrestling. His people of faith have always been asked to believe that we're being led into a future filled with hope. But when your life is in a ditch, that's asking a lot, a whole lot. The ditch you could find on your own, and you did. Now you must enter into a deeper struggle, namely the one you have with God who promised to give you a blessed future so it is God's credibility that is on the line and it is with God that you must now contend.

So Jacob wrestles all night, refuses to give up, give in, refuses to let go. And bear in mind, this is all by God's initiative. God's the one who started this because that's what Jacob needs and sometimes it's what we need. And then at some point before daybreak, God touches his hip and wrenches it. And it seems like a low blow, but I think God is sending a message. And the message is this, "Jacob, your days of running are over." That's all you've ever done in life. You burn a bridge, you run. You burn someone else, you run. You cheat, you scheme, you just keep running. And it's time to change. And not only that, it's time for Jacob to tell the truth a little bit. And so this man, God, says, "What is your name?" Verse 27. The man asked him, "What is your name?" And he may have well been asking, because in these days again, you're named after who you are, you're characteristic. He may have been asking this, "Who are you? Who are you at your core? What makes you tick?" And Jacob comes clean. "Jacob," he answered, "I'm the heel grabber. I'm the hustler, and I've lived up to my name." And then the man says to him in verse 28, "Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome." And if Jacob means heel grabber, Israel means "contends with" or "wrestles with God." He is God's wrestler.

And I love this because it says, if God is saying, "You may still wrestle through life, Jacob, but guess what? We wrestle together. You belong to me. And in the process, I'm going to rebrand you. I'm going to give you a new name, a new identity. Well, how about you? Ask yourself right now, "What am I wrestling with? What am I wrestling with?" Maybe it's a blessing, the blessing of companionship, healing, fulfillment, joy. These are all great things, but remember they're blessings. Can't earn them, can't steal them. All we can do is receive them. And it's our choice, by the way, when we're wrestling in the dark, we can come to a point where we just say, "Lord, that's it. I give up. I'm done with this." Or we can do what Jacob did and we can cling and wait for the dawn. And if Jacob is an example in anything, it's that he just keeps clinging.

And then the last few scenes of his story, it says verse 9, "Jacob said, 'Please tell me your name.' But the man replied, 'Why do you ask my name?' Then he blessed them there. And in those days, knowing someone's name not only told you a bit about them, but it also gave you special access. It gave you privileges." And so what is Jacob doing? He's trying to gain the advantage again. And God says, "Nuh-uh, no more games." Instead, he just blesses him and God leaves him wounded and exhausted. And if you've ever wrestled with someone, you know it only takes about four or five minutes, you're spent. And Jacob's been wrestling all night. He's done. He's spent. And this is where, don't miss this, this is where God blesses him. He blessed him there in that place, in that state, where all he could do is receive. And in response, Jacob says, "Jacob names the place Peniel, saying, 'It is because I saw God face to face, and yet my life was spared.' The sun rose above him as he passed Peniel, and he was limping because of his hip.

But as soon as he crosses over the river, it's back to reality, because it says at the beginning of chapter 31, "Jacob looked up, and there was Esau coming with his four hundred men." Uh-oh, now what? What do you do? What do you do when you've had this mountain top experience with the Lord and you run into the first trial? Well, I'll tell you what I do. I often just go right back into my old habits, my old nature, and that's what Jacob does. And it's kind of comical because he gives up on the whole, let's just separate the family in half thing. And true to his character, he puts the family members that he loves the least out in the front of the line, and the ones that he loves the most in the back. So now everyone really knows how they rate here, okay, where you are. And I'm sure it's not a big news flash to them. They get it. That's dead. But Jacob, he's bowing on the ground as he approaches Esau, as if Esau's going to go, "Well, that's great. That just takes care of it all, Jacob." Jacob expects the hammer to come down on him, just like a ton of bricks. But what happens next? It says, "Instead, Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him, threw his arms around his neck and kissed him, and they wept." Wow. Wow. Who would have saw that?

But it seems that God wasn't just working in Jacob's heart, was he? God was big enough to be working in Esau's heart as well. God was big enough to do things that Jacob never imagined. And that's the way it always works, because so often we wrestle with the Lord, with the assumption, we know all the facts, we know everything there is to know, but you never do. So remember, God is always working in ways I can't see. Always. Pick a situation right now. God is working in ways that you can't see. And when we are humbled by that awareness, I think a great response is to ask, "What do I need to surrender to God? What do I need to surrender Him? My past, my present fears for myself or for somebody else, what can I commit to Him?" We often think of committing as a decision, a way of engaging our will, and it is. And if you have been over this past month, we've been talking about commitment, maybe there's something that God has laid upon your heart. You know, you need to commit yourself in an area. Maybe you need to commit your time in an area of ministry or your talents, your gifts, maybe some of your resources.

God has perhaps been speaking to you and it might be the time where God is saying, "You know what, it's time to cross over the river and see what I have for you." You might just find some surprises over there. But fundamental to our commitments, before any of that can happen, we have to commit ourselves in terms of entrusting ourselves. Like you would commit yourself to your doctor. I would venture to say that you have committed yourself to the care of many doctors, you didn't know everything there was to know about them, you just knew enough. Well, in the same way, you're never gonna know everything there is to know about God, but you know enough to commit yourself to Him because you know He loves you. You know He wants to bless you. You know that's one of His promises.

I'll close with this. There's a man named Rigo, he's a missionary that this church supports. He works in Nicaragua, but prior to that he was an executive for Dole Foods. He was way up in the org chart. He worked in Mexico City. He had a beautiful home, beautiful wife, beautiful cars, apartments where he would keep some of his beautiful mistresses. He was living the life, as far as he was concerned, until his wife discovered his unfaithfulness and she called his boss. And now his entire career was on the line. Well, Rigo had always mocked Christianity. He always thought it was for the weak people, people who needed a crutch. But while he's walking the streets of Mexico City one night, he hears a street preacher yelling, preaching, and he says, "Repent of your sins and your pride and turn to the God who loves the weak and the destroyed." And then for the first time in his life, Rigo said to himself, "That's me. I'm weak. I'm destroyed."

And so when he got home that night, he knelt by his bed and in tears he prayed, "God, I'm so tired of trying to scheme my way to the top and work all the angles. Tonight I commit myself totally to You." And on that night, Rigo's life changed. Today, Rigo leads all the missionary efforts that we support in Nicaragua and he has touched the lives of thousands of people. In fact, here's a picture of him on screen. Notice he's holding two different sized pieces or ears of corn. Not only did God change his heart, but he also redeemed Rigo's past because Rigo has a lot of knowledge when it comes to agriculture. And when he came to a group of people who were literally starving, he said, "What do you need?" And they said, "We need food." And so he taught them how to plant their crops in such a way. The little piece of corn is what their corn typically looked like. The big piece is what it looks like now. They now have so much food that they not only have enough for themselves, they sell it to other people around them.

God changed his heart, redeemed his life, and it all started with a guy who thought he was self-made until he discovered his own poverty. And you discover that and you come to the end of yourself and that is when you will discover God in the life that he has for you. Amen? Amen. Let's pray. Heavenly Father, as much as we can in our own strength, Lord, I pray that we would have the desire to say, "Lord, I'm all in. I don't know all the things that that involves, but Lord, I know enough about you to say, 'Wherever you lead, I want to follow.' And Lord, the things that you bring into our lives will be things that may be unexpected, may be mysterious, some of them may be unwelcome, but Lord, if you're in it, if you're with us, who can truly stand against us?"

And Lord, I think that there's probably many of us here today. We've come here with our hurts and our hang-ups and regrets and even things in our lives right now that we know, they're not helpful. Like Jacob, we're this bundle of strengths and weaknesses and we need your help. So Lord, we just want to fall on your grace. And Lord, I pray for the one who has maybe been trying to keep a step ahead of you for years because they think you're like this big scary God. I pray that the picture of Esau just welcoming his brother in grace or like the story of the prodigal son who runs back and receives that very same embrace from his father, that Lord, you would soften and warm our hearts with that image because that's what you offer to each one of us. And so Lord, we simply come to you committing our lives, trusting you because we know you love us. We know you're good. I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ who makes all this possible, the one who became flesh for us. I pray this in his name and all his people said, "Amen."