Finding God When I'm Dry

Well it is great to see you guys here today. It is such a privilege to be your pastor. I was gone all week long, spoke five times at a conference up in Idaho at Coeur d'Alene and let me just say it is awesome to be back in Santa Cruz again. You know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? Can I hear an amen? But hey you just heard the band Cloverton. If you're thinking to yourself, hey they sound like I might have heard them on the radio. You probably have because they've been on the radio a lot and they're in concert here. It's gonna be a great concert. I am bringing my 15 year old son and my 81 year old mother and they've got something for everything in between and my mom who's sitting over there probably doesn't like that I just told you how old she is so just forget that part. But I hope you can check this out. That's tonight at 7 o'clock.

Right now grab your message notes from the inside of your bulletins that stay still on the top and we're gonna wrap up our four week series on being still and knowing that he is God. As you get those out you know one of my favorite stories in the history of Twin Lakes Church is a story I kind of like to retell every two or three years here because I just love it and it's the story of how we replaced those pews that you are sitting in right now. When we remodeled this building several years ago we decided you know we really got to replace the wooden pews that were breaking down and put in those nice pews that better more cushion that you're sitting in right now they're so beautiful and I just figured the old pews were so old and so broken that we would just toss them.

Leonard Dewick our business manager said you know what let's do something greener than that obviously and let's put them on Craigslist or something and see if somebody wants you know enough pews to seat 1,500 people that are all old and broken. It could be that we could find somebody. Well guess you Craigslist is amazing because we post this on Craigslist free pews for 1,500 people broken but available to a good home the next day we get a call and somebody calls up in this thickly Russian accented voice like literally like the most stereotypical Russian accent you've ever heard and we go yeah Twin Lakes Church but we are calling about pews. Pews, pews, we are wanting pews from church and we figured out that this was the pastor of a big church as big as this church in Sacramento.

I had no idea that Sacramento was such a center of Russian immigration but there's a big evangelical church there that moved into a new building they needed pews they said they had handy guys I could fix these things up and pardon we said you guys can come in and get these pews if you take them they're yours so next week they show up with a couple of flatbed trucks and these people are like out of central casting Hollywood for like Russian stereotypes. I mean I kid you not they show up they got these thick necks big rounded shoulders you know big old pop by forearms hairy and those were the women just kidding they were all guys they were all guys but they had these great accents.

I don't know where they were from I see Connie down here who just got back from the Ukraine just escaped what was going on in Kiev isn't it great to have Connie Fortunato back but you know you hear these kind of accents over there we've heard them watching the Olympics from Russia and some Russians have kind of a light sort of a European accent and some speak very very thickly like this kind of a cartoon character and that was all these guys that were coming to get the pews and so I was spending every moment I could in this room kind of pretending to help them but really it was so I could listen to them talk.

I just kept to advance the conversation I kept asking them stupid questions you know like did you ever know anyone in the KGB you know no we are not all being KGB you are a stupid man you know say that again because it was so awesome to hear it got to the point I couldn't think of anything to talk about anymore so I actually would write things down on pieces of paper and just write down these words and I would say can you just say can you could you just read this could you read this we must get that moose Natasha what is this say it again you know true story so I'm hanging around with these guys and they're getting the fuse and slowly it dawns on me they're never gonna be able to finish this during the day there it's gonna be a two-day job because there's a there's a big building.

So I said would you do you guys have a hotel or something to stay in or a motel can we put you up overnight they said no we are not needing no hotel when we are getting tired we are putting pews together in shape of how you say casket casket casket casket in shape of casket and we are sleeping in pews sleeping in pews and I thought to myself I see that every weekend and then then out loud I said well but you know what it's warm here in Santa Cruz during the day but it can get really cold at night so I can go home and get your blankets so you can you can stay warm overnight they said no we are not needing no blankets when we are getting cold in middle of nights to get warm we are getting up and working to get warm.

And then they started dancing work work on the ball guy now they didn't really dance that's that part's not true but the whole rest of the story is true and as I leave that day from talking to them it suddenly strikes me as I'm walking out those doors what the conversation I just heard is like a metaphor for what the spiritual life can become for many Christians where the pews that used to be life-giving turn into caskets and your faith grows dead and when you feel your heart growing cold the only solution that you know is to just get up and work harder but that's not exactly the biblical answer.

And we really need to talk about this today I know because I've been there and I know because some of you have told me you're there right now where you feel like your prayers are just bouncing off the ceiling like I used to have fun praying where you come and worship and you remember I used to just worship God with joy and tears streaming down my face and now I worship and there's just no feeling anymore I'm numb. We need to talk about this because the Bible talks about it we're in this series called still and we're gonna wrap this up by talking about finding God when I'm dry.

This whole series has been about being still and knowing that he is God it's been about biblical meditation but sometimes you don't feel like meditating sometimes you feel like the author of Psalm 42 and 43 which originally was probably one song together two halves of the same song and he wrote nearly 3,000 years ago these words that sound as current as today as the deer pants for streams of water so my soul pants for you my God my soul thirsts for God for the living God when can I go and meet with God my tears have been my food day and night while people say to me all day long where is your God.

And then in various verses he goes on to say these things I remember as I pour out my soul how I used to go to the house of God with shouts of joy and praise among the festive throng but now my soul is downcast within me deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls all your waves and breakers have swept over me I say to God my rock why have you forgotten me spiritual drought it feels like physical drought in many ways a lot like the physical drought that we're in right now.

Check these pictures out this is pine crest Lake right now all the floating docks have turned into sidewalks boats are aground and dusty lakes all over the state this boat resurfaced after years submerged and I don't know about you but my morning routine has now become an obsession every morning I get out of bed make a cup of coffee then the first thing I do after that is check the internet weather forecast no rain not today not tomorrow not the day after that chance of rain zero percent chance of rain zero percent chance of rain zero percent maybe now they're saying Wednesday or Thursday February is like the new June.

I mean I love all the sunshine believe me but even I'm starting to get worried and you feel this mounting sense of anxiety like what if it never rains again and I hope that we are all praying but that sense of anxiety over a dryness that's totally out of your control is a great picture of the feeling that is going on spiritually in Psalm 42 and 43 because listen drought is part of life in California right this is not the first drought we've ever been in and this won't be the last drought that we will ever be in right we're a state with regular seasons of drought and so like all the experts tell us we need to do everything we can to prepare and to live drought aware and if we don't then the consequences can be disastrous.

Well the same exact thing is true of spiritual drought and that's why this morning I want to talk to you about a condition that will come on you it's just a part of life spiritual droughts a part of life as much as physical drought is a part of life in California it's gonna happen but if you don't know how to deal with it it gets worse and the consequences can be disastrous and so you need to know this first the condition verse one the writer says so evocative great imagery as the deer pants for streams of water so my soul pants for you my God.

I was reading a blog about one of the recent Western wildfires and the blogger took these pics said a whole herd of deer came into their neighborhood and they were literally panting this is what it looks like when a deer pants for water they were dragging along looking miserable why they followed their familiar stream they went to their familiar stream and it was just mud because the fire had dried it all out and no matter how far they followed that stream all the way down into this neighborhood there was no water and the psalmist is saying I feel like that only I'm the deer and the dry creek is God and what used to satisfy me there's nothing there my soul thirsts for God for the living God where where when can I go and meet with God where did God go.

And then he kind of switches metaphors and he says when it does rain it drowns me Lord all your waves and breakers have swept over me and it's interesting because this is typical of drought years too isn't it it's dry and it's dry and it's dry and it's dry and then when suddenly it rains what happens flash flood it's too warm for snow fact up in the mountains and it just all comes down the mountain and you get inundated and weird things happen.

Somebody sent me an article in the Sitka Alaska Gazette with these pictures headline went fishing caught deer a man named Tom Sartre who runs a deep sea ocean charter fishing boat says we were out on the sea when we spotted four black-tailed deer swimming directly for the boat once they reached us they began circling the boat distressed we opened up the back gate and helped these typically skittish animals onto the boat in all my years I've never seen anything like it they collapsed exhausted shivering we had no idea how long they had been in the icy waters of the Pacific or how in the world they even got there.

Once we reach land again the older animals hobbled onto the dock but the littlest guy needed a little more help fascinating story because the author of this psalm is saying yeah here's a picture of my soul I either feel like a panting deer or a drowning deer and maybe those two are snapshots of your soul lately as well you go from numb to overwhelmed but nothing seems normal anymore.

Over in verse 2 of Psalm 43 ever feel like this God why have you rejected me why must I go about mourning it's like I used to be like the happy guy and now I'm the sad guy and it's like it's my destiny and there's nothing I can do about it why must I go about mourning now it doesn't mean he doesn't believe there's a God anymore it means he's lost the experience he has no more taste no more feel the thoughts of God that used to comfort him they don't resonate they don't strike it's not doing it for him anymore it's not that he's lost his faith but he's lost his God.

And it's important to see here that there are other Psalms that talk about this experience of dryness when you sinned when you've done something wrong and you feel guilt and shame and so you've lost that association with God that sense of experience you feel alienation but if you notice that's not happening here it's just drought he's done nothing wrong it just stopped raining.

Now this is huge and very difficult in our culture because Americans if something's wrong I want to fix it right something's wrong I want to know the technique to get rain back and this is why with American Christians you know if we experience spiritual deadness the first thing we think is there must be something I'm not doing right right there must be some button some spiritual life button that I'm not pushing here and this is why it's so hard for us to confess to our friends even fellow Christians at church fellow brothers and sisters you know I'm just kind of feeling spiritually dead right now if I'm really honest with you because just the way our culture is you're typically not gonna just get a sympathetic ear and somebody putting their arm around your shoulder going man you know what I totally relate to that been there.

What you're typically gonna get is somebody who wants to fix the problem what you're feeling spiritually dead well have you been thanking God for your many blessings do you have an accountability partner are you when you read through the Bible every year plan are you playing through it do you have an attitude of gratitude surely there will be nothing wrong if you were just doing your entire daily Christian to-do list there must be something you are doing or not doing to feel like this but in Psalm 42 this guy's doing nothing wrong it's just the way it is right now for him and see that's part of the point spiritual cycles happen to everyone they're just gonna happen at times.

And of course it can happen if you have done something wrong and feel estranged from God because of your guilt but it can also happen because you're alive and this is important especially you know what if you're a newer believer who are here one of the things I love about Twin Lakes Church is we've always got a crowd of brand-new Christians and people who aren't even Christians yet who are just here checking it out we got our one-on-one class in a couple of weeks and I know it's gonna be full of people that are brand new to the faith because it always is it amazes me there's 50 or 60 people there every time it's such a rush for Mark and I and Val to teach that class because it's so exciting to meet brand-new believers.

But listen you really have to know this fact because if nobody tells you this what happens is you experience your first just regular season of spiritual dryness and you think oh there's something I am doing wrong and you can drift into legalism I better be reading the Bible more better be praying more better be serving more there's something I'm not doing right there's some button or you start not just thinking there's something I'm doing wrong you start thinking there's something I'm believing wrong maybe it was all just a dream maybe all this Christian stuff isn't real and you start to drift away but the fact is it's just an inevitable season like drought seasons in California you look at the tree rings you know there's times of plenty and times of drought that's just life.

It's like I told newlywed couples I say that this feeling of rush and crush that you've got for your partner right now believe it or not that that feeling will change and that's so I would say how many of you would say amen but that might be difficult on some marriages here so your wife's gonna go what are you what but but it just is true and what happens is if nobody tells you that you get to that first time when that crush feeling subsides and you go well what just happened nothing that she did ever drove me crazy and now everything she does drives me crazy you're just you're just gonna go through.

I tell you what right now I'm in a cycle with my wife where I'm just entranced by her truly I'm just in one of those crush cycles again I just look at her and I go you know this is the most spiritual and beautiful and self-sacrificing human like ever and she Laurie wrote this into my sermon after she read the rough draft no just kidding she didn't but um but I do I am on one of those highs right now but listen I know that those feelings will vary right that's his life those feelings vary in any relationship including your relationship with God spiritual dry cycles happen to everybody.

But if I don't take care of myself it can get worse right it's like a cold that turns into pneumonia there's no cure for the common cold everybody gets colds but if you don't take care of a cold it can turn into something much worse it can sometimes turn into pneumonia and kill you sometimes I see people and I suspect that years ago this normal sense of dryness happened and they didn't take care of themselves and it turned into something worse.

So to treat it wisely you have to know okay what are some of the causes of spiritual dryness now these things don't have to cause this condition but these things tend to be associated with it first just a garden variety disillusionment with life disillusionment with life he says people say to me all day long where's your God he's going through some trouble in life and so they're taunting him where's your God and wears him down verse 9 he says yeah I say to God why have you forgotten me now it's not just people from the outside he's going yeah yeah where are you disillusion that like let's say you committed your life to Jesus and then the next two years are the worst years of your life I've seen it happen and you go what just happened you know I gave my life to God and then I got cancer and then I and I broke up and and my kids hate me what what just happened.

Well you never think maybe God knew that that was gonna happen and he wanted you in a relationship with him so that at least you'd have that when you went through your tough times that's probably what is going on but you don't think of that usually in the moment what you usually think is wow I gave my life to Christ and now my life is falling apart and you're disillusioned and then the second cause is a drift from community which can often follow check this out in verse 4 he says I used to go with the multitude I used to go with them to the feast now say they're on the first page for just a second and resist the temptation to like flip it over to the next page for just a minute because I want you to see something interesting what does he say I used to go with the what the throng or in some translations multitude I used to lead them in procession to the house of God the subtitle in your Bible says that this was written by the sons of Cora who was Cora and who were his sons in First Chronicles it tells us they were the worship leaders of Israel.

What Trent Smith Dan Baker Ryan O'Lily Adrian what they do for us leading us in worship that's what these guys did for the for the nation of Israel and he's like I used to lead worship and where did the throng worship in ancient Israel what city it was in Jerusalem right he says I used to lead worship and then he says a couple of verses later I will remember you from the land of the Jordan the Heights of Herman so he's not in Jerusalem anymore look at this he used to go to Jerusalem for the feast but now watch look at the screen he's up in the Heights of Herman a hundred and twenty miles north that's the mountain range of which Mount Herman is the peak down in Jerusalem where the people went to worship.

Now he says I remember I used to go there for whatever reason he's removed from it he's up in the Mount Herman mountain range he says I will remember the festival of God what's the festival he's probably talking about the Passover festival when the people of God came together by the millions and remember the great things God had done in the past and it was motivating and it was inspiring and Americans tend to underestimate the value of communal worship experiences year after year poll after poll it's between 80 to 90% of Americans who say I can be a good religious person without going to church or synagogue or mosque or whatever I don't need that and it's true you can worship God by yourself but like we say around here you can worship God in a forest but a tree is not going to visit you in the hospital.

There's a lot you can get out of the community that you're just not going to get in individual worship you need both individual times of worship and corporate times and he has been he's stopping and some of you this is your first time back I'm so glad you guys are back but you've spent a lot of time up there on Mount Herman alone it's great to have you back with a multitude here in Jerusalem and then the third cause is a decline physically verse 3 my tears have been my food day and night did you catch that what's been his food what does he say has been his food my tears what's he saying I'm not eating only thing I'm eating is my tears and then he says my tears have been my food what day and what night he's saying not only am I not eating I'm not sleeping.

Listen you're not gonna be able to deal with the overall condition if you don't realize there's a physical aspect to it this is super important because when somebody says I just don't feel right I don't feel God anymore we have a tendency to focus only on spiritual cures but you are not just a spiritual being you are also physical right you're not a ghost you're flushing blood too and so there's physical causes often to the feeling of spiritual drought not getting enough sleep not eating right not having the right medication there's all kinds of potential physical causes to a spiritual drought and I need both listen this is important because there's some people who will only define your spiritual drought with physical solutions oh well here you just need to take these pills then there's others who will only define it as an emotional problem you just need a psychological cure let me just listen and listen and listen and listen and listen to you and there's others who listen to those first two kinds of people and go those pill mongers those psychology worshipers we're Christians so we're just gonna pray through this in power but the truth is you need all three you need a balance there's physical and emotional and spiritual causes to that drought and that's very very important.

So if that's true and if the Bible prescribes a balance then what's the cure well the first thing I want to emphasize is that drought does not go away overnight you have to learn to value incremental rainfall right every drop you're dropped closer to the drop being cures I have to tell you about a pet peeve of mine we've lived here for 20 years man it seems to me like every single time it rains like every time the next day the Santa Cruz Sentinel has to run their standard post rainfall bummer story every time front page the headlines something like rain does not solve counties water woes have you noticed this and the lead is gonna read something like this more than nine inches of rain soaked the county downing power lines and trees and flooding roads but the drought was not solved no happiness allowed right.

I think we get the droughts not gonna be solved by one storm but every storm puts us a few drops of rain closer same thing spiritually don't go to like church one time and go my spiritual drought wasn't cured it's one bit of rain value the incremental progress and know that the seasons do change bit by bit and while you wait for the seasons to change there's things you can do that are very productive while you wait for things the psalmist does first I need to pour out my soul verse 4 these things I remember as I pour out my soul what a great example this whole psalmist of that if I get nothing out of prayer and worship what do I need to do prayer and worship talk God how annoying this is tell God how much you miss him pour out your soul and then he analyzes his hopes this is huge I need to analyze my hope did you notice there's a phrase that's repeated almost word-for-word three times it's in verse 5 and verse 11 and verse 5 of Psalm 43 why my soul are you downcast why so disturbed within me put your hope in God.

This is not a rhetorical question he's actually looking for information he's asking his soul why are you downcast put your hope in God he's realizing he's so cast down listen because he is putting his hope in some things that are not God speaking personally I can put my hope in things like achievement achievements a rush I can put my hope in other people's praise I can put my hope in accomplishments I can put my hope in my own feelings and all those things are false hopes where is your hope really see spiritual dryness does not necessarily indicate sin but it might indicate false hopes.

So I analyze my hope and then I need to remember the grace of God verse 6 therefore I will remember he's very deliberately thinking about something what by day the Lord commands his steadfast love and at night his song is with me check this out the word translated steadfast love is a Hebrew word that means covenant faithfulness unmerited favor unconditional love remember God does not love you more if you feel him more God does not love you more if you do more God doesn't love you more if you pray more or serve more or are more successful or anything else more his love is based on his covenant his promise it's unmerited it's unconditional it says his song is with me.

Now what's that all about I want to show you something probably my favorite commercial of the football season was one with Colin Kaepernick of the 49ers of course it has to be the 49ers but but it was a great commercial it was for beats headphones and Colin Kaepernick's in the team bus and there's fans all around them that are just screaming derogatory things and they look suspiciously like Seattle Seahawks fans I will say and so how is he gonna deal with everybody yelling negative things at him we'll watch the short version of this commercial.

Man I love that commercial because that has a real spiritual analogy to it doesn't doesn't it the world is all around you too not just Colin Kaepernick and it's shouting all kinds of negative anxiety producing things it's all hopeless all your efforts have been for not God is not real you are unqualified you're unlovable and if you listen to the screams they can really get you down so you have to hear what you want hear what you choose and put on so to speak the beats headphones of God's Word which has adaptive noise canceling and when the negative noise comes I love how he says at night your song is with me he's literally making the whole idea of the grace of God into a song that he's singing to himself at night when the negative noise can be the loudest.

Now you may not be a songwriter like the Sons of Cora were but you can learn these songs that we sing and you can sing songs to yourself like you know the song we sang earlier on Christ the solid rock I stand when everything else is sinking sand when all around my soul gives way he then is all my hope and stay on Christ the solid rock I stand and there's other ways you can do this too we always try to give you the keys to this we put in a weekly memory verse the daily meditations these are ways to put on the beats headphones of something positive and drown out the negative noise of the world.

And then finally I need to preach to my heart he preaches to his own heart notice he's not really talking to God he's not really talking to us he's talking to himself why are you downcast my soul at some point you have to grab your heart and say shut up and listen heart once you've poured out your soul you've remembered God's grace you know you've really remembered all of these things you've analyzed your false hopes and then you preach the gospel to your own so that's the biggest thing I can do to help myself when I'm dry is preach the gospel to myself evangelize myself and then what's the result when I when I remind myself of the truth that I'm saved by God's grace not my performance very realistic he doesn't say I have the feeling back you know I have hope put your hope in God I do praise him he says no put your hope in God for I will yet praise him like I'm not there yet but I have hope that I will once again feel like praising him as I remember this even though the feelings aren't there right now.

Now that's great news but this is better news you've got a resource that he didn't have you know the biggest problem in times of dryness is you think I think God's given up on me God has abandoned me and the psalmist says no he hasn't but here's how you can know you read this song and then you listen to the one who really said I first you read this psalm and then you listen to the voice of the one who really said my God why have you forgotten me you read the psalm and then you watch the one who had people constantly taunting him as he was dying who where is your God now don't you see everything that the psalmist went through these universal human emotions Jesus Christ went through to the nth degree on the cross why so you could know he totally gets it and so you could know he will never ever ever ever ever ever leave you and that's what God brought you here to know.

It's not just the emotions of being on a God high and praising him that God resonates with it's these emotions too they're just as human and they're just as spiritual and he's there with you in those times there's so much richness to be found from listening to Jesus when he's on the cross and I gotta tell you that's why I'm so excited about this we have put together a seven-week series leading up to Easter that starts next week starting next week Easter will be seven weeks away and so what we've done is we've written a book together as a staff called crosswords the final sayings of Christ on the cross it's 49 daily devotions one for every day leading up to Easter and there's a small group series one for every one of the seven weeks leading up to Easter.

Trent Smith our worship pastor and Ryan Lilly our worship pastors over in venue have put together songs that you can download for free to listen to as part of that song in the night the headphones right to wear against the noise of the world the songs the book the small group material is all available for free starting next weekend don't miss it as we listen to Christ's crosswords we got cards like this that you can hand out I think it'll be a powerful series that will revolutionize your spiritual life I think it's gonna just rocket your appreciation of Good Friday and Easter after seven weeks of meditating on this we've been talking about meditating now let's do it on the crosswords.

I'm stoked about that but as we close right now what I really want to do is to pray for you if you're in a spiritual drought at this time let's bow our heads heavenly father first I just ask that in the coming weeks before Easter you would just make real to us what your son did but I especially ask that for those of us who are spiritually dry right now that this would help fill our thirst most of all help us to treat our hearts wisely when we're in the dry times so we can grow in the grace and the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ in his name we pray amen.