Description

Exploring how the early church was a loving posse, not a fortress.

Sermon Details

October 2, 2016

René Schlaepfer

Acts 2:47; Acts 3:1–10; Acts 4:1–20

This transcript was generated automatically. There may be errors. Refer to the video and/or audio for accuracy.

Into a violent world that prized only power, came a movement motivated by love. A few frightened failures huddled in one room became a global phenomenon, fanning across their world within 30 years. With no army, no politics, no detailed strategy, they changed history. How did it happen and can it happen again? This is Acts Odyssey.

Well, good morning. My name's René, I'm one of the pastors here at Twin Lakes Church. Why don't you grab your message notes that look like this? I am so glad you are with us, especially if you're joining us for the first time today. You chose a great weekend because we are beginning our series in the biblical book of Acts, which is a fascinating book of the Bible.

Here's what the book of Acts is all about. A man named Luke, 2,000 years ago, wrote this by interviewing eyewitnesses about how the whole Jesus movement started. And of course, it is totally different on day one than what it eventually turned into and what most people today think about when they think of church. Just 50 days after Jesus died, about 120 of these eyewitnesses go out into the streets of Jerusalem and they begin to tell people about the risen Jesus.

Day one, 3,000 people become believers and their message was simple: Jesus rose from the dead. That was their whole message. They had no budget, they had no organizational structure to speak of, they had no buildings. It was just a tiny group of people who kept telling other people about something extraordinary that happened to them.

There's a couple of ways to look at what church is like. A man named Lyle Schaller once said the church can either be like a posse. Now, to explain that, think of what a posse is like back in the wild west. A posse didn't necessarily have a thing in common. They could be totally different kinds of people, right? But the sheriff would deputize everybody in the posse and they all had a mission to go out and rescue the cattle from the rustlers or catch the bad guys or whatever. And off they would go in a cloud of dust, sort of chaotic, right?

But everybody is empowered, everybody knows the mission, everybody is focused on it. It is outward focused and this is how the early Christians are in the book of Acts, kind of a mildly organized posse of love and compassion and the good news of Jesus Christ. But of course, what happened in the history of the church is that over time the early church got organized, which is not in itself a bad thing, but slowly some people realized, "Hey, I could leverage the growing power, especially political power of the church for my own gain."

And so over time this exciting Jesus movement turned from being outward focused to being inward focused and all about protecting itself and its political power, and the posse turned into a fortress. Schaller says churches can be like a posse or like a fortress. Now what does that mean? Think of what fortresses or castles are like. High walls to keep people out. Very hierarchical. They've got kings and queens and dukes and knights, very top-down, very authoritarian, all about power and authority. They're not about reaching people anymore; they're about protecting what's on the inside, right?

And some of you have had terrible experiences with fortress churches and the tyrant pastors who rule them. And if you have, I apologize sincerely because the whole reason we're doing this series is to try to scrape off 21 centuries of fortress overgrowth and see what the posse of the early church looked like. Because it was amazing. It was exciting. There was something unique and remarkable and attractive and winsome about it, and people wanted to join it.

And so the big question when you study Acts is how can we get back to that, right? I heard a British pastor once say, "Wherever the early Christians went, there were miracles and riots. Wherever I go, they serve tea." Right? So what can we do to inject some of that early posse excitement back into church again? Well, we're going to find out today.

I want to tell you a great story in Acts, chapters 3 and 4, that is a classic posse versus fortress story. And you're going to start to see that dynamic all through the book of Acts. The little posse of early Christians comes up against the fortress of religion. And this is the first time that dynamic happens here in Acts, chapters 3 and 4.

Now, just kind of by way of orientation. And by the way, this is a bring your Bible and crack it open and mark it up series. So if you have a Bible, bring it to church every week, bring it to your small group every week. If you don't have one, we can give you one for free at the info desk. There's also Bibles in the pews in front of you. So if you got one with you or there's one on your phone, crack it open to Acts 3.

Now, by way of orientation, Acts 3 happens right after Acts 2, you are brilliant. That's right. And the very last verse of Acts 2, as we saw last weekend, was this: "And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved." And then the events in Acts 3 are an illustration of this last phrase in Acts 2. Luke is saying, "For example, here's one thing that happened on one day." But this kind of stuff was apparently happening all the time.

Acts 3, verse 1. One day, Peter and John were going up to the temple at the time of prayer at about 3 in the afternoon. And you won't believe what happens next. There was a man who was lame from birth, who was being carried to the temple gate called Beautiful, where he was put every day to beg from those going into the temple courts.

I want to show you where this happened. This is the Temple Mount in Jerusalem. And this is a picture we took while we were there. We had a wonderful opportunity to actually go up on the Temple Mount to go to recently excavated stairs up in the Temple Mount that were only uncovered in the '70s. We filmed this week's small group DVD on those steps. We did it without permission. We just kind of went rogue, so it was very exciting. We got chased out. But we got done, and so you're going to see the video in the small groups.

But in the first century, King Herod did a massive expansion of the temple, made it spectacular. This is a model of that that we saw in Jerusalem. But what does that look like to you, a posse or a fortress? It was literally a fortress. The religion in those days had literally become a fortress with very hyper-authoritarian leaders who would even go up to executing people to protecting their power.

Now this was brand new when the New Testament was written. And just last week, it was in the news again, archaeologists for the first time have found remnants of the temple floor that Jesus and Peter would have walked on. It was the most expensive kind of tile mosaic you could have possibly put in. So when it says in this passage, "The temple gate was called beautiful," I mean, it was stunning. But here's the problem with having a beautiful new building. If you're not careful, the people start serving the building instead of the building serving the people, right? And can that happen here at TLC if we're not careful? Absolutely. It will happen if we're not careful.

And in this story, you're about to see the keepers of this fortress fighting the posse of Jesus' followers that starts to form. Here's what happens. This layman at the temple sees Peter and John walking up to go to worship at the temple, and he begs for money, but it says Peter and John looked straight at him. And then Peter says, "Look at us." And so the man gave them his attention expecting to get something from them.

And then Peter says these great words. Let's read this verse together, Acts 3:6. Then Peter said what? "Silver and gold have I none, but what I have I give to you in the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Rise up." And guess what happens next. This is amazing. Instantly the man is healed. I imagine him dropping his crutches. And Luke says he not only walks, it says he's leaping and jumping around in sheer joy as he cannot believe what is happening.

And he follows Peter and John up into the temple and imagine that scene. The Bible says that this guy had been there for 40 years. So everybody who'd gone up to worship had probably seen him for many, many years, decades. And so this attracts a lot of attention. It causes havoc. You go, "That's Frank. He hasn't been able to walk for 40 years." And they all start to go over there and they go, "What happened to you?" And Peter sees these people. It's a crowd numbering into thousands as we're about to see. And he cannot resist preaching a sermon. This guy's a true pastor, right?

So as all the people are gathering around, it's interesting the way he starts. He does not take any credit for the healing. Watch this. He says, "Why do you stare at us as if by our own power or godliness we had made this man walk?" Now a fortress leader would have been saying, "That's right. I'm going to start a ministry in my name. You guys better start to follow me because I'll look at the authority I've got." But Peter says, "No, no, no, no, no, no. It's not about me. It's not about me. I'm just part of the posse."

He says, "Let me tell you about Jesus Christ and about three different ways he says it's not about us. It's about Jesus." And then he says, "I know you know who that is because I saw some of you at his trial calling for his blood." And he says, "You killed the author of life literally then." He's not speaking metaphorically here. Literally. Some of the people in that crowd. But God raised him from the dead. We are witnesses of this. We saw him alive again. And then he says, "Here's the really good news." Acts 3:19, "Repent then and turn to God so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord."

And so some of the same exact people that got riled up and called for the execution of Jesus Christ become some of the first Christians about two months after the crucifixion. How awesome is that? And a lot of them, it says, "The number of men who believe grew to about 5,000." So 3,000 come to Christ the first day. And then this day might have been the second day, might have been a few days later, but on this day, another 2,000.

Now think about this just for a second. Could these people possibly have been vetted in any way? Not a chance. Apparently in those days it really was like a posse. It was like, "Do you believe in Jesus? The Messiah who died and rose again and is coming back again? Yes, I do. High five, you're in the posse." And all the stuff that we disagree about and all the stuff that maybe we don't see eye to eye on, as you'll see later in the book of Acts, we're going to sort that all out as we're on the ride together because we agree on the essentials on who Jesus Christ is.

So the posse is forming and the posse is riding and the posse is making a difference, but the fortress leaders are watching. Literally from their tower. And they look down and they do not like this one bit. And the high priest in his family, the fortress leaders, they send down the temple guards and they throw Peter and John in jail. And you have to know that the very early Jesus movement has got to be thinking, "Here we go again." A couple of months ago they killed our number one guy and now it's number two and number three, right? Peter and John, they're going to go. What is going to happen next?

I'm going to pause the story with Peter and John in jail because I want you to feel some of the tension that these early Christians were feeling. I'm going to finish the story in just a second, but here's my question. Has God stopped working in exciting posse-like ways? Is God done? Is He kind of going, "I did that then, but now I want church to be like a fortress and boring and staid and informal?" I don't think so. I don't think God is done. I think God wants us to think like and to act like and to be like these early believers so that He can work through us like He worked through them.

What am I talking about? I see five characteristics in this story of people that God uses in great ways. So what I want to do is very quickly make five quick observations about the story I just told and then tell you the rest of the story. So jot this down. First, God uses people who don't obsess on past failure, right? Who don't obsess on past failure.

All through, let me ask you a question. This is not a trick question. All through Acts 2 and Acts 3 and Acts 4, who is the primary human being that God is working through? It's Peter, right? Now just weeks before this, what was Peter doing? Falling apart spiritually, emotionally, very publicly, embarrassing himself. Peter is the guy who when Jesus is on trial for his life betrays him three times under pressure not from a powerful ruler but a servant girl. And all that happened, not years, not decades, but weeks, just a few days before this powerful story we just heard.

I got to tell you one reason I was so excited at the Beach Baptisms last Sunday night. We baptized 72 people. And in my little group, three of the women were from Teen Challenge, which is the Christian rehab center in Watsonville, Misty, Ashley, and this young woman, Jasmine. And these women just glowed with joy as they talked about Jesus.

Now watch this. The woman in the middle of this picture, Misty, she told me and she said, "I could just share with you." She said she had zero religious background. She was incarcerated for 10 years of her life and she's only in her early 30s. But she told me she found Jesus there and now the addictions, the violence, the bad decisions that were part of her past are not what she is focused on anymore. She is on staff at Teen Challenge now and she says she knows that God has a future for her helping others.

Now that doesn't mean these women are going to be perfect. They won't be. I won't be. You won't be perfect in the future. But what does it mean? They're all moving forward in Christ to a positive future and they're not obsessed anymore with the mistakes, the sins, the victimization, all kinds of things that are negative in their past. And what a role model they are for you and for me. Somebody once said, "Jesus does not waste time looking for perfect people because there aren't any." Right?

Listen. If Peter had been as focused on his past failures as you and I get sometimes, nothing I just read you in the book of Acts would have happened. Not through Peter. Toxic emotions like shame and regret and sort of self-pity and self-obsession, some of you are trapped in those but it is not productive. This has stuff for you to do. So you got to leave the past behind, claiming his forgiveness for you in Christ and move forward. You want God to move like he did in the book of Acts again? Number one, do not obsess on past failures.

Number two, God uses people in great ways when they see the needs around them. Really see the needs around you. Remember how it says Peter looked straight at this man. Lots of people saw this man every day but Peter really saw him. Peter saw the need. This phrase is actually one that Luke uses in the Gospel of Luke to describe a habit of Jesus. Jesus would look at people intently and Peter had picked this habit up. But this is not just about making eye contact. This is about keeping your eyes open.

You know, I sincerely believe that God is not done reaching Santa Cruz County. And you know what? You are plan A. You are the way that God is going to reach people. But are your eyes open to the opportunities all around you? Sometimes God has got to pry our eyes open. I've told some of you how on one Easter Sunday morning right after services I had to fly off somewhere so I drove to the airport. I was exhausted after so many services. I had been peopled out. You ever get that way where you talk to so many people at some event or party or family reunion or something? You're just like I'm peopled out. I did not want to talk to one more person.

So I sat down. I'm looking out the window of the plane. It's still on the tarmac. And I get that little urge. I'm not saying I heard the voice of God or something but you know that little prompting talk to the person next to you. And I look over and it was a woman about my age. And so I said, "Ah, Lord, I can't because she might think I'm trying to flirt with her or something so that's a no-go. My wife wouldn't like that." Ever make excuses to God like that? You know, I'm not going to do it. Still felt that little poke. Talk to her. And so I tried to say the kind of the least appealing conversation opener ever. I looked at her and I go, "Uh, great day today. Kind of like try to be really boring. Great day today."

And she goes, "Is it a great day? Is it?" And I go, "Oh boy." And she goes, "I went to church today on Easter for the first time in years and I am super confused about something that kind of bugged me about what the pastor said." She had no idea I was a pastor. She said the pastor kept saying that we could have a relationship with Jesus. Now how is it possible to have a relationship with somebody who's been dead for 2,000 years? And I go, "For an answer, email mark@tlc.org." No, that's not what I said. Honestly, I said, "Do you really want me to answer that question?" And she said, "Yeah, do you know?" And I said, "Well, yes, because I think I have a relationship with Jesus."

And we talked the whole way on the flight. And as we are touching down, literally the last thing she says to me is, "I wish I could find a good church. I just moved to this little town." And I said, "Well, where did you move?" She goes, "You've never heard of it." I said, "Well, try me." She goes, "It's just this little village called Aptos. Can you believe that? True story." Now that whole situation was waiting to unfold right in front of me, but God had to pry my eyes open, right? God has set ups like that for you too. Are your eyes open, or can you ask God to help you see the opportunities around you every day to invite people to church, to just encourage some people? Maybe somebody just needs a hug.

Now some of you are going, "Oh, but there's so many needs. It's overwhelming." Peter and John didn't heal everybody that day. They healed this one guy. Imagine if you and I just had our eyes, if everybody in this room just went, "I'm just going to look for one person today." The stunning difference that we could make if we were that kind of a posse.

And then third, in this story, I see how God uses people who don't focus on what they don't have. They don't focus on what they don't have. Did you notice Peter says, "Silver and gold have I none." Most of us start with silver and gold have I none, and we end with that too, right? You're asking for help while I don't have money right now so I can't help you, right? This is not how posses think.

Just a few weeks ago, the pastor of the Romans Bible Church, as I've told some of you, came to us and said, "Man, I'm really looking for help in our church. I don't know what to do. I'm so discouraged. And I don't know, maybe we can get into a partnership with Twin Lakes Church. I'm kind of, I just don't know what else to do." Now, that was not in our budget at the beginning of the year to do that. And a fortress goes, "I'm not going to send people to another church." But a posse goes, "Silver and gold have I none, but what I have I give to you." And I broadcast the word. They doubled their attendance last weekend with people from TLC attending a Romans Bible Church. We've got worship leaders going down. They're volunteering. They're joining us with this Acts Odyssey.

Silver and gold have I none, but you know what? It's not on the church budget, but we can take care of it with volunteers and they can use our Acts auditors and material and all kinds of stuff. How does this apply to you? I want to show you the cutest kid ever, who is over one year old. The cutest kid ever, under one year's. Well, I'll show you more pictures of him next weekend. But a church in Australia was raising money to support orphan children and this young man did not have any money. Silver and gold had he none. So what did he do? Well, watch this video that he made for his church. Watch this.

Hey church, my name's Ben. I just want to share with you an awesome praise report. I felt very impacted to take on one of those children, but I knew I wouldn't be able to finance it. So I went home and made up a path for dog walking. It first started with me delivering it to the streets. Then it went on to just the surrounding streets and now it's gone as far as the surrounding suburbs. And then work started coming in, I was walking two dogs on a school night since up to five on Saturday and it just kept going up and up and up and up. And it didn't just stop there. Other people who didn't have dogs, there were other creative ways like sweeping I could do for them and other little odd chores. I really love to give them good customer service and get there five minutes early and end five minutes late. And I always make sure to tell them their dog's been very well behaved even when it sometimes hasn't.

Originally I only have a plan to sponsor one child, but now I've got two fully paid for for their first year. I also did some research on how a well can benefit a community and I've saved a bit of money towards my first well. And then I'm hoping to sponsor my third child and start raising money for my first orphanage. I just want to thank God for the love, favor and blessings He's shown to me for the last few months in being able to bring in the money. So come on church, let's give God the praise.

How inspiring is that? Right? He didn't stop with silver and gold, add I none. That's not posse thinking. He figured out how it could get done. If God wants something to get done, God is going to give you the means to do it. And I am excited about what we've got coming up here with the food drive and the fall. I mean, there's so many ways that we can be like a posse in our thinking about how we can get that done. So God is going to make a way. I'm stoked about it.

Then fourth, I see in the story how God uses people who make it all about Jesus. Peter about five different times in his little sermon says, this is not about me. This is about Jesus, period. Listen, a lot of Christian churches in the 21st century have changed the message of the church. You hear some people talking about Christianity and they basically surgically removed anything unique about Jesus. But would you agree with this? If you want the church to grow and be as exciting as the first century church, then proclaim the message of the first century church, right? Don't change it. Stay on message. This is what posses do.

Peter says Jesus was crucified, resurrected. He forgives sin and he is coming again. That was the message. Then that is the message now. And that is the message Peter preaches even in jail. Let's pick up the story where we left off. So Peter and John have been thrown into jail. It says they've been flogged. That's pretty bad. It looks like they are doomed. The next morning, the fortress authorities call them out of jail and they say to Peter, by whose power and authority are you doing these things? This leaders are always concerned about that question. By whose power and authority are you doing these? You're out of order, right?

So Peter says, well, I'm glad you asked. And he keeps telling them about Jesus. And in fact, he says there is no other name under heaven by which we can be saved. And it says in one of my favorite verses of the Bible, when they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished. And they said, what are we going to do about these guys? They probably would have just kept them in jail, except it says the man that they had healed was standing there with them. And I love that little detail. Luke says he was standing. This man had never been a stander. And he's like, you know what? I'm not going to go running off. I'm going to take my stand with these followers of this guy, Jesus.

And they look on and there's an audience and they're all going, what are they going to do? And they're all concerned about the authority by which these guys did this. They don't even care about this guy who got healed. Another typical attitude of a fortress religion. And so they go, there's nothing we can do. The crowd is against us. So they command Peter and John, you can leave. We're going to be gracious. We're going to set you free. But don't you ever dare preach in that name again. And as Peter is leaving, he's just been flogged. He's just been in jail. And he goes, you guys got to do what you got to do, but we got to do what we got to do. We can't stop talking about what we've seen and heard.

And he leaves and they go find the core believers that have been praying for them and they rejoice. And then they all gather around together and they pray. And now watch what they pray. Because if you had just been through what they had just been through, what would you be praying? Well let me ask you this. What do you normally pray? I heard a great message by a guy named Andy Stanley on prayer. And he said, think about how you pray on a typical day. Pretty much we pray for ourselves and our family and like two or three sick people. And pretty much that's all we do. And I'm not going to suggest that you stop praying for anything that you currently are praying for. But most of us, the stuff we pray for is not going to tax God's energy. Like God, give us a safe trip. God doesn't go, oh that's a tough one. I inspire you to buckle your seatbelt.

Or Lord help me do well on my test. You don't really actually even need the power of God to study hard, right? How about kind of challenging God? How about giving God something big? And not just praying for safety and efficiency and health only. Are you ready for this? That's how they pray after they've just been through this. "Sovereign Lord," they said, "you made the heavens and the earth and the sea and everything in them." They're saying, "You are God of gods. You're the maker of everything." They're reminding themselves of who God is. He's in control. And then verse 27, "Indeed Herod and Pontius Pilate, both the Jewish and the Roman leaders, met together with the Gentiles and the people of Israel in this city to conspire against your holy servant Jesus, whom you anointed."

They, watch this, they did what your power and will and decided beforehand should happen. In other words, they believed even those tragic events were not spiraling out of control of God. Even these things were under his direction. That's important to remember. And then watch this. "Now Lord, consider their threats and here is the ask. Here's the gimme. Here's where we usually start." And what do they ask for? Protection? Safety? They actually never even mentioned that. They say, "So enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness." For us 21st century Christians, is that even a category in our Christianity?

You know, do we pray for, now I'm not saying pray for weirdness, right? But do we pray for boldness? And that's just the first thing they ask for. Then they ask for something even more extreme. And this might make some of you uncomfortable. They only ask for two things. First boldness, then verse 30, "Stretch out your hand to heal and to perform signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant, Jesus." Now do you ever pray for this? This is how this posse prayed. But do you ever pray for this? You say, "Well, I don't go to one of those churches. That stuff freaks me out." Right? Think outside that category just for a second of what you imagine a church like this would look like. And let's just look at the text.

What they were asking for is signs and wonders. Now those could be miracles. They do suggest healing. But it could be any other kind of a sign, whatever God wants to do, that makes people look on and wonder and points them to Jesus. What they were praying for was for God to show his power as they went out into the community as a posse, any way he wanted to, to show skeptics there was reason to believe. What if you prayed, "God, do something through me?" Among my friends who are like super smart and super cool, but kind of anti-church, kind of skeptical. "God, would you stretch out your hand and show great things to them through me and through this posse we call Twin Lakes Church and Aromas Bible Church and the other churches around here?" Somehow.

Point five is a posse prays big prayers. Pray big prayers. Now the point wasn't some weird, mysterious, spooky, the pastor laid his hands on some people and then they fell down. You know, that's not what they're asking for. They're asking for power to go out into the community and do things so mighty in the community that the community would say, "What is happening over there?" Honestly, I look down, I see my wife here, she's going in January with our India mission trip to do the medical-dental mission in India. And I've already been praying for her, but what have I been praying for? Classic American prayers. Safety and efficiency.

God give her a safe trip and make it efficient to help that legendary bureaucracy not to gum up the works. And I'm not going to stop praying for that, but what if I added to that, give her boldness and stretch out your hand to do great stuff? Can you imagine what would happen in Santa Cruz if all the Christians were to pray this? Give me boldness with my friends, just courage. And God, would you stretch out your hand and do something through me in my sphere of influence that could possibly get them to take another look that would be wondrous to them and a sign? What would happen if you prayed that?

So what happens next for these guys? Watch this, it says, "The whole building shook. They were filled with the Holy Spirit. They all spoke the word of God boldly." So that prayer gets answered. And the very next verse, Luke says, I got to tell you this, "All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had." Now watch this, apparently this is the miracle. This is the next sign and wonder. Suddenly, along with boldness, there's this outbreak of extreme generosity. Luke says, "God's grace was so powerfully at work in them all that there were no needy persons among them." What? In this case, that's how God answers their prayer. Their generosity becomes the wonder and the sign that points people to Jesus Christ.

Does that ever happen here? Absolutely. I have run into so many people who have said, "When I heard what you did at the food bank, you know, I decided I need to check out this church." That's why we do these acts of kindness projects because as you're installing benches at the Homeless Services Center or as you're doing a beach cleanup, you're going to get into conversations and God is going to show his power and draw people to Jesus. In fact, I would say this is the most effective sign in our culture, in our community.

So let me close with this. Can we really pray big prayers here that it will happen again? Now I'm not saying change some way you are praying. I'm saying maybe add to your prayer. God, give me boldness and God, stretch out your hand however you want to, to be a sign and a wonder in my life to skeptics around me. I'm totally open to whatever you want me to do. You know what? I am pretty sure God will answer that prayer. I don't know how. It's going to be exciting.

In a minute I'm going to have us all stand and we're going to move into a time of communion by reading this prayer together. Now if you're not really into this, I'm not forcing you, you don't have to say this, you can stand and just sort of mumble, nobody will know, but I want to challenge you to say this. Our prayers tend to be all about God, don't let me skin my knee, you know? Don't let me experience any delay, no inconvenience. But what about this prayer?

Let's stand together and let's read. I'm going to have us read it twice, right? Because the first time it will feel a little bit awkward and the second time we'll be focused more on the meaning of the words. That's just the way we are. So let's read this out loud together as a prayer. Now Lord, enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness. Stretch out your hand to heal and perform signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant, Jesus.

Now I want everybody who's standing, and I hope people are standing as they're watching over in venue as well, to say this out loud again and this time really from your heart, now that you've read the words out loud. Now Lord, enable your servants to speak your word with great boldness. Stretch out your hand to heal and perform signs and wonders through the name of your holy servant, Jesus. Amen. Raise your right hand everybody, raise your right hand. You are deputized. You may be seated.

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