What Really Matters

The world is a rude place. And so we need to rediscover the lost art of love. Good morning, once again my name is Rene. I'm one of the pastors here. And I am so glad you made it on Mother's Day. One more time, let's give it up for the moms today. We love you moms so much.

Well, in this series, The Lost Art of Love, what we've been doing for five weeks is we've been going through one of the most famous chapters in the Bible, the love chapter. And that's fun to say. Would you say that with me? The love chapter. Isn't that fun? 1 Corinthians 13. Now, listen, as we've been saying, here's the problem with this chapter. We are so familiar with hearing it like at weddings, and even on Mother's Day cards, that it's almost easy to imagine sometimes that it was written for moms or for weddings. But it was not. It was not even written with romance or moms in mind.

This was actually written on the occasion of some very rude, self-seeking Christians who were sort of the forerunners of everybody who's ever given Christians a bad name in 2,000 years. This was written originally to the Christians in the city of Corinth during the first century of the Roman Empire 2,000 years ago when the New Testament was being written shortly after, a couple of decades after the death of Jesus Christ. And there's all these little communities of new Christians kind of emerging.

And these Christians here in Corinth had a problem. Because Corinth was a boom town. Corinth attracted the most entrepreneurial, the most type A, assertive people. That's great. Nothing wrong with that. These people were just making a lot of money and kind of like, just kind of a dog eat dog world. Let's get to the top pioneer frontier city. But that kind of leaked into the church. And the Christians in the Corinth church had kind of created a toxic environment. They were argumentative. They were divided.

Now they were also brilliant and charismatic and zealous. But the Apostle Paul writes them this letter. It was literally a letter to these Christians living in Corinth saying, "Yeah, you guys are brilliant and charismatic and zealous, but you've kind of become brilliant, charismatic, zealous jerks. Because you've forgotten what Christianity is supposed to be all about, which is love." And he kind of explains this for 12 chapters. And this is sort of, his big thesis statement is kind of the two-thirds of the way through the letter.

And he writes this beautiful poem that we're all so familiar with. And one of the things he said, as we've seen in this five-week series, is kind of the Corinthians, "Listen, guys. If I have prophetic powers, if I understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have enough faith to move mountains, like if I'm like a super Christian in every other way, but I don't have love, I am what? Nothing." Because Jesus said that's what it was all about, is love.

And he says, in case you forgot what love looks like, as we've seen, he goes on to say, "Love doesn't envy. It doesn't boast. It's not proud. It's not rude. It's not self-seeking. It's not easily angered. It keeps no account of wrongs." In other words, as somebody said, if you want to do the opposite of Paul's advice, here's how to live. Think about yourself. Talk about yourself. Use the word "I" as often as possible. Continually monitor other people's opinions of you. Be suspicious. Be jealous. Be sensitive to slights. Never forgive a criticism. Do everything you can to get ahead and sulk if people are not grateful to you.

That's how to live the opposite of a loving life. That's how to be miserable. And that is emblematic of so much of our pop culture today, isn't it? But Christians are called to be different. And now we're going to get to the last few verses, 1 Corinthians 13, 8 through 12. And this is kind of the big climax to this already beautiful poem where Paul talks about what really matters in life. And it's so appropriate to talk about this on Mother's Day because mothers in most of our lives are an example of the kind of love we're going to be talking about.

Now, again, the problem with this is these verses are so familiar to us that we almost forget what they originally meant and therefore how we can apply them to our lives. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to go through these familiar verses and just make a few explanatory comments, historical, cultural comments. And then we're going to apply these. And one of the people who's going to help me apply these to our lives is my wife, Laurie. I could not think of a better Mother's Day gift for her than to have her do half my job. And so she's going to join me in a few minutes.

But Paul starts with 1 Corinthians 13, verse 8. "Love never fails." Say that with me. "Love never fails." Now, interestingly, the word fails in the original Greek, it doesn't mean love never fails as in if you love somebody, they're always going to love you back. We all know that's not true. Here's what it means. In the ancient Greek, that same exact word was used most often of a flower that's beautiful and blossoming and attractive, but eventually it begins to wither and fall. And the word is used fails. That's the same exact word, Paul. That is just kind of ugly, isn't it?

But Paul's saying everything else will fail, everything except for love. Love is the flower that never falls. That's what he means when he says love never fails. Love goes on into eternity. And so the whole rest of this chapter kind of telescopes out of that three-word phrase. And he starts to compare love with some of the things that the Corinthians were so obsessed with in the rush to be the best Christian on the planet, the super-Christian. He says, "Yeah, where there are prophecies, they will cease. Where there are tongues, they will be still." He could be talking about a supernatural gift of prophecy or speaking in tongues, or just in the natural, the ability to speak well, the ability to know a lot of language.

Either way, the point is the same. As wonderful as those things are, they're not going to last forever. In fact, he says, even where there is knowledge, it will pass away. How can he say that? He says because right now we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the partial disappears. That's a poetic way of saying, you know, in heaven, like in the new heaven and the new earth, when Jesus Christ's kingdom is fully manifest in absolute perfection here on this earth and heaven and earth are reunited, that's perfection. And we won't need these things that we value so much here on earth.

And he goes on to explain this poetically. He says, "When I was a child, I talked like a child, thought like a child, reasoned like a child, but when I became a man, I put childish ways behind me." He's saying it's like we're all children now, but one day it'll be childhood's end and we'll be grown-ups. And he uses another poetic metaphor. For now, he says, we only see a reflection as in a mirror, but then we shall see face to face. Now, the Corinthians would have known exactly what he was talking about. I talked about Corinth was like a place of a lot of trade and a lot of commerce. And one of the hot industries in the city of Corinth at the time was mirrors.

In fact, my wife, Lori, and I have been to the ruins of Corinth and in the museum, the archaeological museum there, they have several mirrors they have found in the Corinthian ruins that are really quite beautiful. These were made of polished bronze back in the day. And sometimes they were put on wooden handles so that this would have been about this size, would have just been like a portable mirror. Sometimes they were put on beautiful stands and this is something that you'd have in your house. What they do is they would pound out a piece of bronze so that it was really flat, cut into a circle, and then mount it like this. Now, of course, these are all corroded because these are 2,000 years old. They're like, that's a terrible mirror. I can't see a thing.

But in those days, of course, they would polish them and they'd keep them buffed so that you could see your reflection in the mirror, kind of like on a chrome bumper in a car or something. Now, it wasn't perfect, like hourglass mirrors that are silvered on the back. Somebody hadn't discovered that yet. And so this is the best they had. It was true. That was really a reflection of you, but it was blurry. It was a little fuzzy, not wrong, but just not quite perfect. And what he's saying to the Corinthians who are like these arrogant know-it-alls, he's saying, do you understand that that's kind of like what our theology is like right now? All we can know about God, it's true, but it's a little blurry. It's a little fuzzy, but then we are going to see him face to face.

So now I know in part, but then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. Now look at those phrases. Now I know in part. I think we Bible teachers really need to own that. The most accurate, the most orthodox, the most biblical Bible teacher only knows in part. That doesn't mean the partial is wrong. It's like you could teach your five-year-old two plus two equals four, right? That's a long way from that to Einstein. In fact, your five-year-old's brain couldn't even conceive E=MC2 most likely. That doesn't mean this isn't true. It's just partially true. And this is what Paul is saying. What we know about God is true, but we just don't see the big picture.

But then we will know fully, even as we are fully known. It's kind of like this. Let's say you had some gigantic dot to dot picture. Remember those dot to dots that you used to do when you were a kid? Let's say you had one that was the size of this room, and you looked at it and the dots number into the hundreds, and you're able to piece these together in order, but you're still like, "What is it? Is it a boat? Is it a flower? Is it a shoe?" I don't know, and you make your best guesses. And you're accurate with the way you've lined up the dots, but it's not until you see in full that you understand the big picture. And this is what Paul is saying.

We know what we know, and when we study Scripture, we can know accurately what it reveals to us about God. But then we're going to see the big picture. Then you're going to understand all your answers to the problem of evil and free will versus the sovereignty of God. And how do you understand the Trinity? And why do good things happen to bad people? You'll see how the dots connect. Sometimes there's mysteries that we can't solve here. We can do our best, but we just don't see the big picture yet, but we will. And what I love is the last line, "Even as we are fully known." You right now, you're fully known by God now. And you are fully loved. Say, "Fully known and fully loved," out loud with me. Fully known and fully loved.

Most of us deep down inside, we don't believe those two will ever go together. Like if somebody fully knows me, they're not going to love me as much. But God fully knows you and fully loves you. And then Paul says, "And now these three remain, faith, hope, and love." These three are always going to remain. No one can take away these three things from you. You could have cancer, and they can't take away your faith, hope, and love. You could have all your property taken away from you. They can't take away your faith, hope, and love. People could mistreat you. You can still have faith. You can still have hope. You can still have love.

But then Paul says something interesting, but the greatest of these is what? It's love. Why? Again, he's talking about heaven, the new heaven and the new earth. The eternal reign of Jesus Christ over creation promised one day. He says, "Then you're not going to need faith anymore, are you?" You need faith now because we walk by faith and not by sight. We don't know all the answers, so we've got to have some faith as we move forward into the future. But you won't need faith then because you'll see how it all fits together.

We need hope now because we can't see over the horizon, but one day you'll be over the horizon, and so you won't need to hope for it anymore. What will remain is love in eternity. You're going to live soaked in God's love, suffused by God's love, surrounded by God's love, and with people you love, and with the Lord who loves you. It's going to be all love. Now, some of you might go, "Well, yeah, of course, yeah, that's heaven." Do you understand that this is a uniquely Christian understanding of the afterlife, which the ancient Romans did not have? This is revolutionary.

So a couple of months ago, Laurie and I were in Rome, Italy, working on some stuff for the coming series on Simon Peter. We're going to be doing a series on him in the fall, and we visited Hadrian's Mausoleum. This is a gigantic building that was built as the family tomb for the Roman Caesar Hadrian, just massive. And you go inside of it, and there's like this spiral circular ramp that leads you down into where the tombs were. And this is the niche where the emperor's tomb was. In those days, it was covered with marble and gold that's all been stolen by grave robbers over the years.

But on the wall is still the remnant of a plaque that he put up on bronze that Hadrian wrote for himself. This is what he wrote on his tombstone. This is the best that a pagan Roman could hope to look forward to in death, like the best of the best Romans. And here is what he wrote, "Little lost and gentle soul, get ready now to go down into colorless, arduous, and bare places with no more jokes. May he rest in peace." Then Laurie and I walked over the next day to the Christian catacombs from around the same time. And there's some of the earliest Christian artwork painted on the walls, how they looked forward to what came next.

And guess what there is pictures of in almost every Christian catacomb? Banquets. This is one of them. Feasts. Hanging out with Jesus and your friends, surrounded by love. And it looks to me like one of them may be even telling another one a joke. You see, what Paul is saying is that for Christians, love now is our link to eternity. Love is what it's all about. And so if that's love, he's saying to the Corinthians, we're so concerned with so many other distractions. That's what we ought to be focused on.

Because you could apply it three ways. Number one, love is what fulfills. Love is the only thing that's going to fulfill you. So Arthur C. Brooks is a professor at Harvard Business School, teaches a famous class there, Leadership and Happiness. It's the most popular class at Harvard Business School. And he talks about what makes you happy. And he famously tells his students, "Yeah, it's nothing you learned here at Harvard." He said, "What you've learned at Harvard Business School is going to teach you how to be successful. But if you confuse that with how to be happy, you're making the biggest mistake of your life."

He says, "According to research, we now know that happiness has everything to do with our love relationships." And specifically, your love relationships in four areas. Your faith life, your family life, your real friendships, and work that serves others in person. He says he had to discover this for himself the hard way. He said, "I've been working 80-hour weeks and part of it was a pathology." Workaholism, success addiction, fears of failure. He says, "The problem when you're a workaholic is that people congratulate you." Nobody says, "Man, you are so good at drinking gin." Nobody ever says, "Dude, you're unbelievable at how much meth you can consume."

People feel sorry for you when you're addicted to other substances or gambling or porn, but when you're a workaholic, they congratulate you. But he says, "Look." That's what he tells his students. "If everything you do for your happiness is work, that's like putting your entire pension into Greek bonds. It might work out, but I don't recommend it." Happiness is about people. And let me go back to his first line. Happiness has everything to do with our love relationships. Or as somebody once put it, "If I have not love, I gain nothing." Love is the only thing that's going to fulfill you in life.

Love is going to outlast every ability, every gift, every talent, every skill. It's going to outlast your athleticism and your looks and your possessions, so why not major on the thing that's going to last? And that brings me to point two: love is what lasts. And to help me make this point and carry you through to the second half of this sermon, my wife, Lori. Here's why Lori has credibility on this. Now, you might know Lori's an adjunct professor at Western Seminary. Lori is a professor of world religions there and has been for a number of years. Lori's also been a pastor. Lori has a degree in theology. But that's not why Lori has credibility on this.

I'm going to embarrass you. Lori's got credibility to address this because she is honestly one of the best examples I know of the kind of love we're going to be talking about as a mom and also as a wife. I love you. I love you too. Happy Mother's Day. And I want to specifically acknowledge my mom who is here this morning. I'm going to have you stand up. My beloved mom, June. I had such a wonderful mom growing up, really wonderful. And she continues to inspire me. It's amazing though when I was a teenager, I really came to the conclusion she knew nothing. And by the time I had my own children, I thought she was a fount of wisdom and knowledge. So I really appreciate you so much. Happy Mother's Day.

1 Corinthians 13, Paul has been riffing on love and now he's making this remarkable observation that love's going to outlast everything that we think is important. Now the Corinthians thought speaking in tongues and prophecy were so important to pursue. And that really doesn't tempt me a whole lot. Occasionally it would be nice to have the gift of prophecy. But otherwise, no, those are not the things that I pursue. So how do I apply this for me? Well, I need to remember that love outlasts perfect lives. Love outlasts perfect lives.

When I discovered I was expecting my first child, Jonathan, I was over the moon because we had struggled with infertility for a number of years. And so of course we were just elated. And I decided I was just going to be the best mom, the perfect mom. And his little nursery was going to look perfect. And I was going to just have a perfect home that was so well organized. And I bought subscriptions to those Better Homes and Gardens magazine that told me how to keep my house organized and beautifully decorated on a budget. And I thought, I will have that house. That will be me. That is going to be what my perfect life is going to look like.

By the time our second child, Elizabeth, blessed Elizabeth, came along 22 months later, life got really busy, busier than ever. And I wasn't keeping up with that perfect image of what I thought my house and my motherhood and everything should be. And one day when Elizabeth was about three years old, I found her playing with her dollhouse. And I just stopped to watch. She had a mommy doll, a daddy doll, and two kids, just like our family. And I thought, how cute. She's playing with her little family in her little house. Until I realized that she had the mommy doll in her hand, gripping it like this. And the mommy doll was stomping around the house, the dollhouse, going, "I'm so frustrated. I can't find anything in this stupid house. I'm so frustrated." I mean, I was horrified. She was imitating me.

That was her enduring image of what her mother was like. So I said to her, "Honey, what's the daddy doing?" And she looked up at me and smiled and she said, "He's on the couch taking a nap." I said, "How observant you are." But that was a wake-up call for me. Trying to have the perfect Better Homes and Garden life and home was turning me into a very frustrated person all the time. And really, it was distracting me from pursuing what I really wanted in our home, which was just love. So I canceled my subscription and gave up on the idea of the perfect home.

We all have mental pictures of what our perfect life should look like. What is it for you? Does it revolve around your career or money or a beautiful home or being that perfect mother? Well, all of that will be gone someday. When our grandson Freddie was born, my daughter-in-law Kelly put up a sweet little cross stitch in his room that her grandmother had made when Kelly was born. And so her mom had had it and now Kelly had it and put it up in Freddie's room and it says, "Cleaning and scrubbing. Wait till tomorrow. For babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow. So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep. I'm rocking my baby. And babies don't keep." And boy, is that true.

As I'm watching even my grandkids grow up so fast, cleaning and scrubbing, okay, I know it eventually has to be done and you have to go to work to earn a living and you have to have a car that gets you from A to B. But all of that is true. But if you make that your focus is like that is the definition of my perfect life. You will miss out on what Paul calls the most excellent way. A life that's focused on love. So love outlasts any idea we have of a perfect life and love also is going to outlast all our right answers, all the right answers we might have.

I do a lot of reading. I listen to a lot of academic podcasts. And since we started the Bible Conference here, which I hope I know a lot of you came to, and we started that last year, had one this year, we're going to have another one next year, I'm always looking for scholars that we can invite here to TLC. I'd like to have the top scholars on the planet come to teach us. And by the way, the Bible Conference next year, I'm putting in a plug, March the 8th, we have the amazing Amy Ora Ewing is going to be here with us from the UK. So mark your calendar for that.

But when I'm listening and I go online and look at YouTube videos, I'm not only looking for scholarly expertise. I am looking for tone. I am looking for their approach. And really what I'm looking for is love. Do they lead a life of love? Because if a scholar is brilliant but snarky, I'm not really interested in having them here to TLC. I remember going to the annual conference of the Evangelical Theological Society. I was so excited to go to this. This is a great big deal in the academic world. All these scholars come for three days of seminars and panel discussions on all kinds of topics. And I really wanted to hear this one particular scholar. He had written a textbook on systematic theology that all the schools were using. He was at the top of his field and several times I had spotted him at the conference and he always had this little entourage of admirers following him around.

But when I went to this panel, this panel discussion that he was having with other scholars, he was so arrogant. So arrogant, so condescending toward the other scholars that had a different opinion than he had on the topic. Now I have no problem with vigorous discussion and disagreeing viewpoints. That's not a problem for me. But it was the arrogant attitude that I went, "Wow, that is a problem." I'm not telling you his name because maybe he went home and went, "Oh man, I really blew it." So hopefully that's what happened. But this is exactly what Paul is warning us against.

Because there are people who know scripture and theology fluently and are arrogant and self-righteous. You might be asking, "Aren't right answers important? Shouldn't we try to study and know what the Bible says and what God wants us to know? And shouldn't we teach that truth to others?" Yes, absolutely, of course. But Paul says, "Even if you have all knowledge, if you don't have love, you have nothing. You have nothing." Now here's why I tell you that story about that professor. Don't be that guy. Don't be that guy as a coworker. Don't be that guy as a friend. And don't be that guy as a parent.

Kids today are looking for answers on all kinds of cultural questions. So be prepared to give them answers, scriptural truth, as best you understand it. But make sure that your right answers are grounded in love. They are covered in love, they are surrounded by love. Because it's your love that your kids are going to remember. And if they stray away, it's your love that I believe will bring them back. So love outlasts all our right answers. And third, love outlasts great ability. Rene touched on this. Last week he talked about his mom, Rosemary. And what an amazing person she was. She just was a servant from head to toe. She loved to serve people, had this big heart of mercy.

She was a key volunteer here at Twin Lakes Church. She could always make people feel better just by being the way she would be with them. And she was a wonderful mother-in-law to me. She happened to live in town. My mom was always a wonderful mother to me when I had my kids. But she lived in a different city and we didn't get to see her as much. Rosemary lived nearby. She was always eager to come over and help me with the kids. And when Rene and I would go out on a date, I'd come home and I don't know how she did it. But the kids were all scrubbed and in bed and my house was perfectly clean. I don't know. She just loved to do that for me. She was wonderful.

But all those gifts came to an end one day. We began noticing and then came that diagnosis that she had Alzheimer's. And we brought her into our home for the last few years of her life. And her ability to serve faded. She could not be of any help to me anymore in my home. Her ability to speak faded. And her ability to comprehend faded. But for her, love never faded. It was what she, really the only thing she could receive was love. And she had only three words left that she could say. They were, she could only say them in her mother tongue, which was Swiss German. But she would say these three words often. She would say "Schön," which means "beautiful." And she said this any time we would take her for a drive or a walk. And she'd just point to the flowers in the ocean. Schön, ocean, schön, beautiful.

And then she would say "Danke," thank you. She could say that. And she would say it every time. I put her to bed or helped her get dressed or set a meal in front of her. Danke, she would say. I could see the gratitude in her eyes. And then she would say this. She would say "Schatz," which is a Swiss word of endearment that means "I love you so much." You're my treasure is really what it means. And she would say that to any family member, even though she wasn't quite sure who we all were anymore. But she knew that she loved us. And she would say "Schatz, Schatz." So even if you run a big company, you have a demanding job, maybe you're a highly skilled nurse, an amazing cook, maybe you're a veteran teacher. Whatever your abilities are, those are wonderful.

Those are a gift from God and you should use them to the fullest. But ultimately, if you live long enough, even if you don't get Alzheimer's, hopefully not, but even then, your skills and your abilities will fade. Just like metal that you set out in the backyard in the rain, rust is going to happen. It's going to happen. But love is what will last. Love makes impacts that last both in your life and in the lives of every other person around you. My daughter-in-law Kelly came up to me after the first service this morning and she said to me, "Laurie, I want you to know that you are that mother-in-law in my life that Rosemary was in yours." And I thought it's really the example that my mother and that Rosemary gave to me about how to love and serve a daughter or daughter-in-law is the reason that I'm the way I am.

That love impact continues through generations. Some of you who know me know that if you see me in the bookstore or whatever around, I always wear a cross. Every day I've been wearing a cross necklace for about the last four years. And it's not that I don't like other kinds of jewelry. I do. It's not that I think that wearing a cross is going to protect me or it's my lucky charm. I absolutely don't believe that. But every morning when I put it on around my neck, I hold it and I pray. And I say, "Lord, I am your follower. That's who I am. That's my identity. So let me represent you well today when I go out into the world. Let this be a reminder that you are calling me to love everyone that I come in contact with today. It's my reminder."

Because representing him well cannot happen if there's not love. So I haven't had the nerve to put any kind of a Christian symbol on my bumper, on my car. I'm not quite there yet. I'm still growing and learning how to love while driving a car. Not quite there. But this at least helps me when I'm face to face with people to remember who am I and whose love am I representing. So love, its effects on people in my life, its effects on me. This is what's going to outlast any version of a perfect life. Any accumulation of knowledge or having the right answers and any ability that I might have. And that's why Paul says, "Now remain faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love."

Thank you. She is my better half. She even did the better half of the sermon. That was so good, Lori. Well, let's land this plane here. Finally, love is what works. This is kind of where Paul's going with this because he's saying, "You guys are Christians, and you have all these abilities that you think is making you a great church, but it's not really." He goes on, in fact, the first verse of the next chapter is, "You have to follow the way of love because that's your greatest testimony to Jesus Christ. In fact, you could do all this other stuff," he goes on to say, "and people might just think you're crazy, but if you have love for one another, that's what's going to draw up to Jesus."

So how can I do the way of love? Well, guess what? We're going to be starting to talk about that next weekend. A new series called The Jesus Way in the Sermon on the Mount, the most quoted, most influential, most revolutionary speech in history by Jesus Christ. But first, let's wrap this up with one observation. My biggest fear about this series is that you'll leave this and go, "Oh yeah, this is all good. I've got to try real hard to love like that." It's like a car thinking, "I need to go fast without kind of gassing up first." What you need to do to get to that kind of love is first realize that's how you are loved.

You could cross out the word love in 1 Corinthians 13 and just put Jesus to understand this, right? Jesus is patient. Jesus is kind. Jesus keeps no record of your wrongs. Jesus always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres in your life. That's how you are loved. So do you want to love like we've been talking about? Who doesn't? The way to get there is to plug into the source of that kind of love for you. As Tim Keller says, "Before love is a behavior for a Christian, love is an experience for the Christian." And so I want to give you an opportunity to plug into that love in prayer right now.

Would you bow your heads with me and close your eyes? And I just want to speak to you whether you are a veteran Christian and you've fallen away from a focus on love and distracted by all kinds of stuff, or maybe you are not a Christian, you've never come to your life where you've committed your life to Christ. Here's a chance for you to reorient yourself. There's a word for reorientation of the Bible, repent. And to say, "I want to turn from these things that just aren't going to last anyway and turn to Jesus Christ." And you can pray something like this, "Lord Jesus, I turn away from those things that just aren't even going to last. Things I need, but they're not the important things. And I want to turn toward faith and hope and love for you, Jesus. And to receive the love that you showed on the cross for me and in your resurrection for me. I don't understand it all, but as much as I understand it, I believe and receive and I am secure in your love. In Jesus' name I pray, amen."